Rants

1

Alone

April 15th, 2017by fighting_alone94

So maybe it’s not much of a problem I mean I’ve been through way worse and felt way lower in my life but for some reason I can’t help but feel alone and depressed. Growing up I didn’t have friends and I hit my peak in middle school. I have hundreds of friends well I guess looking back none of them were really my friends but once I got to high school everything changed I didn’t trust anyone and I was the most paranoid person in the world. Not like omg the FBI is after me but like I always felt that someone was going …

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2

What is depression to you?

April 15th, 2017by M_f_p

So this is my first time posting here. I’ve had depression for about 1.5yrs. Something I don’t really understand is why people don’t really understand what depression really is? Why are other things that are so pointless, educated in our lives like maths or science. I know there is so much to learn in this world but I guess you need to really feel it to know what it is.

Do you think killing your own self is worse than a terminal disease like cancer or even killing someone else? How hard would a decision like that be to kill your own self. Contemplation is my …

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4

Never ending pain

April 15th, 2017by Broken_Masterpiece

I know I write a lot, but I am so grateful to finally have a place to express myself without those I know judging me. The pain never stops. I feel like my soul is constantly being crushed. I smile and **** and it is scary how good I have become at hiding the pain. Or maybe they don’t want to see. It is sad how desperate you can be just to know someone is there for you, that longing for the most basic of human interaction. I thought I was ok. Always goes that way, then the darkness returns, always a bit worse, a …

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2

empty

April 13th, 2017by lonelygirl645

i’m empty inside. I don’t care what happens to anyone around me. I don’t have the will to live. I hate everyone around me. I don’t know who I am. I don’t want to live but I’m too scared to die. I want all the pain to stop.

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4

Done trying

April 13th, 2017by Broken_Masterpiece

Trust me….

I am here for you….

How those empty words echo through my mind. I let my mask slip for a second to bare my soul, naked and alone. All I want is love, acceptance and maybe even a hug… The prison I am in is guarded by severe loneliness. Serving a life sentence. Why am I an outcast, why am I hated. Why am I alone. I have had it with trying, screw love, friendship and all those things, clearly I am not deserving.

For months on end I have been quiet, festering on the inside, like a virus eating at my soul. Now I am …

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3

Fucked Over by Public Schools

April 13th, 2017by kloudkat

I’m eighteen, I’m a senior in high school, and I’ve attended four different high schools, one for each year essentially. I’ve suffered from depression since I was eleven (due to childhood abuse), and during the beginning of my sophomore year, I suffered from my first severe flash back starting my downward spiral of PTSD and Major Depressive Disorder. During the fourteenth week of school that year, I was admitted into a private mental health facility for inpatient treatment. I was there for eight days, and right afterwards, I attended iOP which is intensive outpatient; it lasted for six weeks. So I was gone from school …

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1

disgruntled

April 13th, 2017by Lazarus

Sorta upset. Sorta not. Mostly disgruntled. Okay, I’m pretty upset.

Its my birthday in a few days..  April 15th. I’m turning 18. Having a dumb party and all that good shit. Which.I’m excited about, yeah. But after that I have to take my fucking GED test that I’ve been studying for for years now on top of regular high school. (Its a weird homeschool situation.) sorta upset I had to drop out. That my high school diploma I would get if I didn’t drop out wouldn’t even count. Really upset that I have to take this dumb fucking test.  I just want to pass. I’m so …

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2

Depression cycle

April 12th, 2017by GrayXX

When people say it gets better I believe that to be a lie. I have been dealing with depression for most of my life and just when you get better shit comes up and drags me back the the darkness of my mind and chains me back up until I can get free then drags me back into a endless cycle. From my experience it is always a endless cycle of in and out of depression. And I’m sick and tired of fighting, I’m sick and tired of people telling me that it’s going to get better because for most of my life when it …

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19

I know I’ll probably regret this…

April 12th, 2017by whiskered-fish

…but sometimes, I deeply loathe “normies.” Or at least most of them.

Tonight, I’m just seething with rage, thinking about it. They make my blood boil. Fuck them. Fuck them and fuck their functioning brains, which they take for granted. Fuck their unwarranted sense of superiority. Fuck their hatred and contempt for the weak. Fuck their forked tongues and narrow-mindedness. Fuck their bright futures and their smug condescension. Fuck their cruelty. Fuck everything about them.

Part of me realizes that this attitude is probably a phase that’ll pass—something toxic that I’ll look back on in a few months and cringe at. But for now, it …

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2

My Life, Why I Want to Die

April 11th, 2017by AnonymousUser27

This is a short explanation of my life and why I want to die I’ll keep it short but I plan on killing myself rather soon so I’d like at least someone to have heard this story. I’m 20 years old currently and have been severely depressed for the past 12 years. It started when I was around 7, I was a smart kid who loved school but was athletic too. I was much more athletic than my grade and the one above it so I played with the much older kids. At the time I didn’t realize but they were picking on me and …

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18

Got my exit out, here’s my story

April 10th, 2017by ImSayingGoodBye

To whom this may concern,

My name is Dave and I am 26 years old and I have become full out suicidal. I was never suicidal till now. I in fact loved my life and every inch about myself from the way I look, to my personality and my talents. My story is a pretty sad one to say the least. It’s a long story but I’m sure whoever is going to read this will here me out completely. It’s like 2 things that really knocked my health into hell. So I’ll just label them as A and B and I will start with

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1

Should I go to the hospital?

April 10th, 2017by kloudkat

I turned eighteen almost a month ago, and I had been in a remission type deal from my Major depressive Disorder for about six months. Until last week. I feel no motivation to do anything. It takes so much effort to take a shower at night, I went from taking full showers at night, to half showers (standing in the corner of the tub and just washing my hair), and then to saying “I’ll just take one in the morning” and end up allowing all three of my alarms to go off and hopping in the shower to wash my hair five minutes before I …

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6

next attemp

April 10th, 2017by Moon gazer

i finally found the place for my next attemp i just need to experiment a bit and write a letter so i have everything in order hopefully its less than a month i am happy only regret i cant finish reading all things i wanted to read but i cant put it off

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4

It Gets Worse & Worse

April 9th, 2017by BrokenDreamer

I had posted before about what happened to me and what occurred.

Now things are getting worse. I learned that an injury I suffered due to the abuse will require surgery and the surgery most likely won’t stop the pain.  My insurance won’t cover it and the other pain treatment that they would do can’t be done because of other health issues I have.

I also just diagnosed with another painful debilitating medical condition 2 weeks ago and was told that in a yer or two i won’t be able to walk that well and will be in more pain due to severe arthritis.  I’m having to …

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9

I was doing so well.

April 8th, 2017by 96530

I was doing so well. I was enjoying life more than I could have imagined for the last few months. I have great career prospects, excellent friends and a marvellous family but there’s that one thing missing, that one thing which will always be missing.

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7

Personality

April 7th, 2017by CombatDamage

Who else here, has had so many mental disorders since childhood, that you never really developed an actual personality? You don’t have one, because you never even had a chance at one. Having just a a strange slew of symptoms. Personality? you don’t have one only having a strange slew of never ending symptoms that make your head spin and turn. They say healing things like depression that the goal is to “get back to your old self”, but I don’t have anything to go back to. Just static nothingness.

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1

Am I capable of change?

April 4th, 2017by EternalDetachment

Am I capable of change?

Lately, I’ve been asking myself this question a lot.
For most of my life, I’ve been a difficult person to get to know. It was hard for my parents, my siblings, my extended family, and even the one woman I thought could be the love of my life.
I ran from conflict, because there was never an easy way out. I simply wanted to exist, live, laugh, and love.
It seemed that I would never have any of those things. My childhood was fraught with poor choices and poorer memories.
It’s hard to think of a time where I wasn’t sad, alone, and angry. I …

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9

What’s the point?

April 4th, 2017by imjusthere

What’s the point if I can’t get better? What’s the point if things do eventually get good only for everything to get bad again? What’s the point if the people who say they care about me don’t want to be around me? What’s the point of going to college when I know I can’t be successful? What’s the point of trying? What’s the fucking point?

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4

I’m Exhausted

April 3rd, 2017by imjusthere

I’m simply existing.

I have been for all of the nineteen pathetic years of my life.

I’m numb to everything due to exhaustion. Exhaustion from fighting, caring.

All my life, I’ve been a shadow, a second choice, an afterthought.

I truly love my parents. I really do. But all they care about is my much older brother. They paid for his college, they encouraged him in everything he did, and they’re proud of him. They don’t want to pay for my college, they don’t care what I do, and they see me as a burden. He was the good-looking, athletic kid in high school and I was the below-average-looking, …

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1

Hey

April 3rd, 2017by kamidaka

I feel like shit right now. Depression kicked in so so hard. I even locked myself in the bathroom and laid down on the floor for a couple of hours, I think

It feels like someone behind me is trying to rip my heart out.

I hope I feel this bad the end I decide to end my life so I can really do it.

My father told me today “this website says that if you sleep too much you feel sad. Are you sad?”

No shit, bro. And you even dare to ask.

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