I’d like to speak to you!!! Celia is that you whom chose such an amazing name. If so then after our rampage, bEfore I die. Let’s say goodbye with a goodbye hug and goodbye cream soda. If you’re not Celia then hello I love cream soda much more than you OuO
Condition is critical. What becomes an adult, the more you realize that you are coming from. Looking back … It’s disgusting. An endless series of mistakes, my own and others led me to the present condition. There are two exits. And only two. Because we can no longer be in this state. The first way of events. Go to a mental hospital. Throw a biological faculty. Continue to suffer. Parents learn about orientation. This life is not only spoil them, but my boyfriend. And it’s not torture minute, and a long agony. Can hypnosis and powerful drugs rebuilt my brain. And I forget the part […]
What a useless emotion… I have kicked drugs, stopped drinking but I can not let go of this self pity and depression… Today I took a nap and upon awakening I did not have a desire to use or drink I just want to stop living… I don’t enjoy life as other people… I want to leave the present… i don’t like it here… the world sucks, government sucks and people suck… if i choose to die today i will hang myself… i will try to hyperventilate and then just tighten the noose around my neck… this should cause me to pass out so that […]
I came directly from http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
I went online and sought for help, because I found myself sitting with a dagger and poking myself with it, and suddenly I just burst into tears, crying. I thrusted the knife at my chest, I am actually not sure what happened, but I stopped myself before it was too late somehow, then I decided I needed help from someone.
I’m am not sure how to go about my story, but I guess it goes back quite some time, I think, I’m not sure, I’ve been depressed over the last year, it has been getting worse and worse, really I […]
Waking up after a sleepless night spilling your heart out feels strangely similar to a hangover. Fuzzy memory of things you couldn’t possibly have done, coupled with a vague feeling of mild shame, hazy bafflement and a skull-splitting headache. Cold apples help a little too.
Still, it was good to unload, not to be judged on one’s weaknesses. Mind cleared of the fog of depression, for now. Even now that I’m almost cheerful I can see clearly will come back and decisions are still to be made, death still an option as ever. But the clear mind should last for a couple of days at least […]
Im supposed 2 b happy right now… My parents were worried that im isolating myself too much so they came to spend the evening w/ me. My dad, in his best insterests, suggested sum drinks cuz we use2 always do that… Iv recently decided to stay away from LQ cuz it doesn’t help, but… I couldn’t tell my dad no. After sum drinks my parents went to bed and i stayed up… Couldn’t stop thinking… Of the reason I’m here… It’s torture… I wish the pain would stop… How do I make it stop…?
Hello there!
This last 24 shift was like hell. Daytime its okay, but at night here came suiciders. For the first time in my job time we got 4 at night! Usualy our psychiatric team with proffesional doctors are going to such patiens, but they didnt work yesterday.
Nobody knows why, but all psychiatric ER was full of such people. Not a full-moon.. hmm., And they all chosen drugs. What a fools! i didn’t meet any of them died from drugs, we always come in time and save them.
I was very angry. Non of them told me a serious reason why decided to die.. Love, Studies, […]
anyways, it was right under my nose that Dr. dolittle was blackqwert as I just found out.
I have been drinking cream soda almost every day, trying to stay sane and happy. (very exhausting) The cream sodas effects on me are wearing down (enjoyment and whatever happens in my brain to elevate my mood).
Well so far, I’ve been failing half my classes. Not doing homework, unable to concentrate. The idea that the end is near makes me feel at ease to be failing. But it still stresses me. I still desire death even though I haven’t done much to desire it. I may have […]
I cnt take this anymore. Wenever i can i lock myself in my room lay in bed cry and cut myself. the pain makes me feel numb inside ihave scars on my wrist arms shoulders and stomach i also have burn marks on my skin from the few times ive intentionaly burned myself.tne pain seems to drive off the feelings of sadness and anger but aftr awhile seeing the scars just fill me wit more rage and self hatred wich just leads to me doing it all ovr again. Icnt stop myself. And it seems like im isolating myself. Icnt handle dealing wit actual […]
I just want to fucking die. I hate myself so much by this point. I have no fucking reason to be sad, I have everything I could ever want and still I lay in bed wondering why I’m still here. I want to have a life, but I can’t keep going like this. I thought I was in bad shape before, it’s even worse now. Night terrors are waking me up every hour, Insomnia is keeping me awake until the point of complete and utter exhaustion, Depression is giving me crying spells, G.A.D is keeping me in my “safe places” which have been reduced to […]
I need to get away. From this crazy place called home. From this depression. And especially from myself. I don’t even know myself anymore. It makes everyday things so hard to do. I want to get away from all these tears. I’m pretty sure crying so much that you get sick isn’t good. I can’t take it anymore. Everything’s pushing me over the edge and I’m scared I’ll fall.
My life is falling apart. My 4.4 GPA isn’t enough for my parents. My best friend in the whole world hasn’t talked to me in a week. Everyone I ever trusted has left me within the past 3 months. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong but I really can’t take it anymore.. I just wanna get out of here. I don’t wanna live anymore..
I was fifteen, he was roughly 21. We dated for a week before my parents found us out. We had sex once. Add note here- Just for anyone to know, when I was older, I waited months until myself and a boyfriend indulged in carnal pleasures usually reserved for marital relations, but at fifteen he was so persuasive.. I’m 21 now and my number of sexual partners remains at five. I’m married now. Anyways, back to the story. We dated for a week and had sex once. He supposedly proposed to me, and like a foolish little girl who was taken aback by the affections […]
so I just got home from a birthday thing my friend had and I feel like crap. I tried to be normal for her and not ruin the night but it was so hard, because she had it at the same place where I met this guy who ended up stealing my heart and he passed away recently. all night i kept seeing his face and replaying that night over and over again when i met him there and it was like my heart kept breaking all over again each time.
We all have an […]
It angers me so much when I see everyone taking life for granted. I lost so much in the past 5 months. I lost my cousin to suicide May 2, 2011. My mom raised him. He turned into an older brother role. I feel like I lost my brother more than anything. I lost my nephews and niece because Ricky’s wife no longer talks to us. We are a family divided. Events like this bring you together. Not in my family. It tore us apart. […]
I just don’t know what to do anymore.. The only thing it feels like I’m doing in life is to cry and self-harm. I want it to end. I don’t know how. I feel so damn lost.
When I get to the barest very most essential of my turmoil it really comes down to a choice between death and change. Change beyond anything I or everyone close to me ever imagined me capable of. How is such a choice obvious or easy? Whatever I choose my life will soon be over.
Looks like I won’t be sleeping much tonight again.
