My name is Taylor. I’m 17 years old. And I’m ready to go…Â Â I’ve been bullied since I was 9. And even before that I always had trouble making friends. I have Asbergers Syndrome, and thus its painfully hard for me to talk to people. I’ve been to about 11 schools. I kept dropping out and going switching schools. I couldn’t handle the bullying. But the thing is, even though the setting changed the story never did. I always got picked on and left out. Id come home crying everyday. In 9th grade the bullying hit a peak. I went to a small private school then, […]
I’m new here so I guess I’ll start with some history. I have three half-blood brothers, and one full-blood brother. I have one half-blood sister and a woman I consider to be my sister, but really isn’t. My parents passed away. My mother when I was two. My dad when I was eight. I was molested when I was nine. I lived with a very sadistic and controlling woman for about four years. I then moved in with my brother, when I was twelve. He taught me how to live, how to love, and how to be a good person. I’m now in college. I’m […]
People have told me, “Don’t do it, Emma” and “You can talk to me about anything”. But I can’t. I know I’m not alone in this but it always feels like I am. I’ve had people call the Suicide Hotlines on me and I’ve helped other people get through their own depressions but I can never seem to shake the pain, loneliness, jealousy, or depression. I have problems I know I need to fix but I just can’t.
Im 14. My name is Emma and I live in Colorado. When I was three, my mom and dad divorced after my mom knowingly broke my younger brother’s […]
i’m tired of a lot.
i feel as if i have no life and no space. my father left us 3 years ago and he hasn’t been there much. he calls rude things and lies just about every day. i told him i dont see him as a father figure.. and he doesn’t really do much to change it.
my baby brother turned 5 yesterday but he has down syndrome. his test this year came out showing that he is in a mind of a 2 year old. and of coarse he still wears diapers, he doesn’t talk yet. exactly like a 1 year you could say. […]
Can’t believe I’m posting here. Thought I was over all of this. I’m 42 now. Lifetime of depression, anxiety, anorexia, and bulimia. I had gotten to a point where I had left a bad marriage, bought my own car, own house, raising my child, and held a full time very difficult job. I decided to change shrinks 1 week ago who suggested I do “talk therapy.” I went to 1 apt and have essentially fallen apart since that apt. This was totally unexpected. Apparently, I’ve been trying to hold everything together all these years…just keep going, just keep going, and follow the routine is what […]
I’ve had enough of this pathetic thing people call life. Every time I’m happy, something goes wrong. Also, I’ve gotten past the fact of leaving people behind. I no longer care about that, I just want to leave…and never come back. I want to die to prove to people how bad their words really hurt. Everybody thinks that I’m so happy and carefree, when really I get home, cut every night, and cry myself to sleep. I deal with shit at school from just about everybody, shit with my abusive dad when I get home, and shit when I go to work from my de-humanizing […]
please if anyone is out there help me, if anyone has a decent enough heart please help me. I can’t keep living like this, I can’t keep living with this abuse. Please I need help I need help. I’m going to kill myself and I don’t want to I can’t leave my baby turtle all by himself. I’m so scared and no one will believe me no one listens. My own dad has turned my whole family against me. He keeps lying and lying and lying. No one fucking loves me anymore. My friends won’t help me I’m going to get kicked out of my […]
 To what_Is_Love13, the time will come when we shall all become angels,
just dont go on your own yet, for you are not alone.
what is love? love is you,
love is when someone reaches out and touches you..
~
Laura Elisabeth Rhodes
1991 ~2004
Laura’s Last words.
“I waited for my mother to walk in. “Laura, I am sick of running up and down these stairs,
now get up.” I would look at her
“What is wrong now?” “My tummy hurts and I feel sick”.
“It […]
I have spent the last two weeks in bed. I have no desire to get out of it. I feel like i am dead but still alive. I am worthless and dont deserve anything. I was the last born in a family of five. My parents had me late in life. My brother who was twelve when i was born was murdered. My brother had a friend that was dealing drugs and setting fires. He was going to testify against is fromer friend. His family had my brother killed. He was struck a car late one night and died of massive head and chest. It […]
My mom just took her own life back in july and i am the one that found her. I dont know what to think of this. and i have a really difficult time understanding why. I am going to counseling and it helps.. I just feel down a lot of times. I have thought a little bit about doing what my mom did. But i dont think i could every put someone through the pain i have went through… My dad is also in jail now.. So Help me understand and advice? Please.
well now both my parents know i started cutting again. and i hate it… i dont want to talk to them about it.. i cant its too hard. but my mom doesnt understand this… i think my dad helped her to a little tho. becuz last nbight she said she didnt think it was nessesary to go to therapy becuz i can talk to her. she then said she’ll talk to my dad about it, and when i woke up this morning she said that i have to go speak to the school counselor today and if they think i need therapy then i’ll go.
but […]
I’ve been on the end of my rope now for about a week. So many things have been going wrong and getting so much worse. The reality of physically not having anywhere to go after I move out of the dorms for the summer is really starting to sink in. I tried to convince my boyfriend that we should stop seeing eachother to make it easier for him when I go. I can really see that there’s no getting better for me. I feel like it would be easier for him if we weren’t together when it happens. He was so confused and it made […]
I messed up my life at 7 years old. I learned what everything a adult thought of was, and my parents were getting divorsed. My mom hit my dad, and they always cussed eachother out in front of me. We were in the car once, my brother opened the door and was SO close to jumping out. he was leaning out of the car. If we hadn’t pulled him in, we would have seen him dead on the highway. we were screaming, and the one who didn’t help pull him back in was my mom. she yells at us, and nearly killed my dad. My […]
I want to do it.
On monday, im planning again…. Apart from this time i haven’t made the mistake of telling ‘Everyone’. So my intention is to travel to a bridge…and you can probably guess the rest….
Life has not gotten better, its gotten worse? My OCD has. Fear of things are coming back…and my hands can tell you that, they don’t appreciate soap as much as i thought they would….
My family know ‘Everything’…at least thats what they think, they’re some things i havent told anyone….and probably never will….It has just made life awkward, and the arguements don’t stop, either about me or about my dad.
My new […]
Im young. Im young, so young and I know I have so much to live for.Â
But I have a destroyed childhood, and family that has lied to me since I could process things through my mind. A mother who cares about herself more than her daughters, who is willing to let her children be molested; verbally and physically beaten. A father who has continuously filled his daughters with hate by verbally, physically and mentally abusing them alongside with their mother. My mother will soon be filled with severe Alzheimer’s and she won’t have me or my sister to help her. Which is just another burden […]
I keep starting and deleting everything I write. I try and articulate how I’m feeling and what I feel I need to do but I just can’t. It’s not so much that I’m insecure, mostly just that everything I try to explain doesn’t come out right. Writing has never really been my strong point. I really need someone to talk to but there really isn’t anyone here (not the site but where I live). I tried to open up to my mom but she’s was so oblivious to what I was trying to tell her. And I can’t really blame her because she is going […]
you know when you feel lower than everyone? your grades are not that high that no one lets you take a decision because they think youre too young… that everyone around you is aloud to tell you what you shouldnt do or be or even like, while you arent aloud to discuse with them….I’m here … lying in my bed thinking again about suicide… yes im sick of life like everyone! i’ve started to think about suicide since 6th grade… now im in secondary 4 … in overall i have problemes everywhere… whatever i may do people around me get dissapointed and if i do […]
Lately I’ve been through a lot of stuff, well it’s my senior year and I really need to think about what I am going to do with the rest of my life, the thing is my mom is putting a lot of pressure on me so I study what she thinks is better, you see my mom is a mess, I love her I wish I wouldn´t honestly maybe that way I would not care about what she does or says, she hurts me she was upset and she told me I was her mistake that she did not wanted to make the same mistakes […]
i am 15 years old and living in ireland my story begins when i was only a todler mabye 2 years old growing up with my weed smoking dad he had serious anger problems and because of this he scared me for life im not able to go to school and be with teachers who shout because i only break down in tears and because of this every 1 at school laughs at me meaning that i have no friends 13 years later and still have no friends i have also discovered that i have epolepsy as i am always shaking i cant go to […]