Home Tags Posts tagged with "the future"
Tag:

the future

I would give anything to go back

by kupo95
written by kupo95

When I was 10 or 11 and my mom just got sick at the time and I was sent to live with my grandmother. Normally no big problem except my grand mother is a ***** and has favorite grand childen Im not one of them. Now the time I spent my grandmother I appreciated now she taught me how to make money cook clean. Problem I slept on the floor was not allowed on her orange suede couch.

But I do have good memories despite the the hours of drilling of being a good wife for the future. Like stay up late listing to music choice […]

Continue Reading
1 comment
0 Email

Whatever… at this point I don’t know what I’m doing anymore.

by Dog1IsOpen
written by Dog1IsOpen

Ok so let’s get the elephant out of the room. I don’t expect to get help from anybody on this whatever it is. I am only crying for attention like I do whenever I feel overwhelmed. I feel overwhelmed right now and I have begun my suicidal thoughts again. I don’t want to preach or pretend like I have any insight to offer. All I want to do it express my feelings in this rant I’ve made;

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————–

Words on a page what for and have we to. This drunken stupor of man’s design. To keep the life and the divine. To keep the soul intact and […]

Continue Reading
1 comment
0 Email

last day…

by Soco
written by Soco

So I figure this question has been asked alot. But what would y’all do on ur last day on earth.?
I’ve thought about this alot, & what I come up with are things that im sure will remind me of how great the world can be. And then I will convince myself to not do it. Get in a slump some time in the future and want to cease to breath again. And once again play this whole freakin cycle over again. So I wonder if having a form of a bucket list is a good thing, or should one stay in the current […]

Continue Reading
9 comments
0 Email

ha

by One Million Masks
written by One Million Masks

i don’t really come here for help anymore, so please ignore me; i just wanted a place to ramble.

i never in my wildest dreams thought i would make it to eighteen- not once, even at my most optimistic, did i seriously consider the possibility that i’d still be here today… but i am here.

i don’t really know how i feel about that.

it’s almost kind of laughable, you know? like a bad joke or a fucked up riddle, what’s still there but not, what should be gone that isn’t, what do you call a ghost that’s still alive– and it’s me.

it’d be nice to say hey, […]

Continue Reading
2 comments
0 Email

Sorry.

by AKidWithAName
written by AKidWithAName

I’m really sorry to anyone who wastes their time reading this, so I’ll try to make it short.

I am not a necessity, nor a nicety, so why do I continue to roam this bloody earth in hopes of finally being wanted. I’m not wanted now, I wasn’t wanted in the past, and I can’t help but think that I won’t be wanted in the future. I’ m a liar, an accident, an attention whore, a know-it-all, and just an all-around piece of shit. Why am I even still alive?

If it’s not a problem for anyone reading this, would you […]

Continue Reading
2 comments
0 Email

Live like you’re…living?

by fitzgerald
written by fitzgerald

I’ve been living like I’m dying for awhile now. Ready to take the plunge any day. It’s depressing but so relaxing. No fuss, no planning for the future, no caring what people think. Temporary.

I’ve been offered a nursing job. Going to be staying alive and seeing how it goes. No use in ruining everyone else’s lives right now.

It’s stupid, but I had just gotten used to being a walking corpse. A sick part of me is a little disappointed.

Continue Reading
0 comment
0 Email

by MissDysphoria
written by MissDysphoria

I’ve been lying to everyone about how good im doing in school and that ill be graduating in two weeks and have all these great plans for the future and that me and my bf are happy and i have jobs lined up and everything they expect to here.
But im not doing well in school at all. Im failing four classes so i wont be graduating. Im not going back to school and i have no jobs lined up, havent even looked into it. Ill be moving in a month but i have no house situation prepared. And i dont think me and […]

Continue Reading
4 comments
0 Email

“Hell is empty and all the devils are here”

by bloodstainedlips
written by bloodstainedlips

I’m sitting here on my bedroom floor, blood dripping from my fingers, trying to convince myself to just end it all. It could all be over so quick. How can that not be tempting. I’ve often thought I’d wanna go painlessly, up until recently. My life has shattered around me, the people I cared about most have up and left. I decided that I didn’t give a fuck anymore. I decided “fuck love” and “fuck right and wrong. Nothing in my life has ever been right.” I’ve been wasting myself, losing myself. I hate myself for the things I’ve done, but I don’t care enough […]

Continue Reading
17 comments
0 Email

Fucking Life

by magnolia
written by magnolia

So I’m not going to go into all the details of what’s wrong but some key facts:

I’m in HS
I take Spanish 1
I’ve suffered with depression and suicidal thoughts for years

So I’m in HS and I take Spanish 1. I’ve hated it since beginning of the year. I didn’t get a choice in my foreign language, my mom chose. So basically a bunch of shit was happening and I have 5 weeks of school left and I know nothing, but it was ok cause I had an A+ and everything was barely barible. Then week before last my Spanish teacher quit/was fired. I have a new […]

Continue Reading
3 comments
0 Email

Follow up for Existential Depression

by TheHandle
written by TheHandle

So, I already had my initial appointment with my new psychiatrist. He said he was familiar with existential depression but was not too familiar with existential psychotherapy. He asked about all the anti-depressants I’ve tried and I told him I’ve tried them all and I don’t respond except experiencing the horrible side effects. He wrote me a prescription for Remeron, which now I recall I was on before and had extreme fatigue and dizzy spells from so I am not taking the medication.

Today I had my first appointment with the therapist who the psychiatrist wanted me to see for CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) even though […]

Continue Reading
4 comments
0 Email

No Future in Sight

by jmc22
written by jmc22

I’m heading on towards the future and I’m being told to start thinking about my future. The scary part is, though, I don’t see myself having one. I try to think about it, me going to college, having a job, meeting someone special. But I just can’t see it. I’m so scared because everyone around me is figuring things out, and I don’t know if I even want to live ’til the end of high school. My chest tightens up, my head starts hurting, everything gets a bit fuzzy, and my head becomes an empty void. Is this just me?

I don’t even know how to […]

Continue Reading
3 comments
0 Email

I lost my Soulmate.

by kirru63301
written by kirru63301

I lost my soulmate.

I loved her with all of my heart. We’ve known each other for five and a half years and we were best friends. It was an online relationship and we were young so we weren’t serious about it. But a few years ago we realized we could really make this work and so we tried. We stood by each other through thick and thin, through the stress of me having a job and graduating high school and everything. I felt like I had the perfect future because we promised each other we would go to the same college and work in the […]

Continue Reading
5 comments
0 Email

One day

by _Audrey_
written by _Audrey_

I am depressed and I’ve been depressed for many years now. I have told my mom what I was going through and she ignored me.  I’ve told her two times what I was going through and I got nothing. But just recently, she listened but I’ve decided now its too late. I’m going to do it. I’m going to kill myself. Some time in the future but it will come.

Continue Reading
11 comments
0 Email

Late night vent

by Ijustwanttoendit
written by Ijustwanttoendit

For as long as I can remember, I didn’t think life was worth living because everything in my eyes was absurd, then I met a guy, started talking to him and he made me feel loved, he gave me a reason to smile again, But on October 20th I got word that my nephew had committed suicide. I hit a new low. I was at ROCK BOTTOM. Getting that news was paralyzing. I felt like my dreams were ripped from my very hands, torn, and thrown in my face. I started to shut everyone out including the guy who was my light for several months. […]

Continue Reading
1 comment
0 Email

Out of the game…

by Brokengirl
written by Brokengirl

This game called life is not a game I want to beat. 1,2,3 lives you’re out. The only enemie is yourself. The hate I have the struggle i feel. Death is the best option. Fuck the future, fuck the present. Fuck tomorrow I want to die tonight. Always feel like nothing and no one. No love no respect. I am who I am but why? I’ve heard it all my days are up.

1,2,3 it’s game over…

Continue Reading
2 comments
0 Email

…

by claritee
written by claritee

My ex and I talked last night. We basically put our friendship on standby. I think that it was a really bad idea to try to be friends so soon after breaking up. I’m glad we did, because I admit a lot of my anxiety and depression came from that. I do want to be his friend, but it’s just not the right time for him and not the right time for me. I feel as if a load has been taking off of me. But I do feel kind of sad about it. I can’t predict the future and I don’t know if our […]

Continue Reading
0 comment
0 Email

Ready

by Drowning
written by Drowning

i think tonight’s the night to try again we’ll see how things go had enough of life i feel iv lived long enough you know when people say things get better when is that ? Happiness isn’t promised think I’m living with faults hopes with no plans for the future  no goals just the battle everyday with myself this isn’t living life it’s just surviving another day and having to act like your doing fine and handling life but really your face down in the gutter drowning in thought trying to keep your head above water if this is how the rest of my life […]

Continue Reading
6 comments
0 Email

Trying To Let Go

by thehusk
written by thehusk

I just saw an ex-colleague I have a thing for for the first time in three months. Kind of weirded me out, because a) I thought she’d moved hundreds of miles away, and b) it was the first time I’ve left the house in a week. I find myself thinking about her often, (which is sad and pathetic for so many reasons), and then there she suddenly is.

I didn’t talk to her or anything – didn’t even catch her eye. Had the weird feeling of simultaneously dreading her noticing me, or saying anything – because of my extreme social awkwardness – whilst longing for her to […]

Continue Reading
2 comments
0 Email

Bath Calls

by betterlife
written by betterlife

When the bath’s drawn, the phone’s off, the house is empty… as it always will be… what do you do? When there’s no friend to call, no family in existence, no job to work, no place to attend, tomorrow, nor the next day, nor the day after, no car to drive, no health to live? What then? Cannot one simply slip into oblivion, forevermore? Isn’t that okay now? Finally?

I’m stalling. Why? Is there a man to stampede through the front door, thumping his chest with the almighty courage of one in love, to say, nay! Not tonight! This shall not be! Whisking me away in his arms, hair […]

Continue Reading
2 comments
0 Email

Jeez..

by headupunderdarkcloud
written by headupunderdarkcloud

Had a gun to my head for several hours this morning, safety off, squeezing the trigger, the hammer pulling back, then letting off. Another night hardly any sleep.
Gotta move out of this shit dump in 19 days, no plan where to go next, fully overwhelmed, so much shit to move out, and so laying here in bed typing instead. Just at my breaking point.
Aimless, no plans.
I turned to the girl had over the other night and saw for the first time in the morning light a nasty cold sore planted firmly to the corner of her lip.
Great, may have an outbreak […]

Continue Reading
4 comments
0 Email
Newer Posts
Older Posts