sometimes the reason you can feel suicidal is as simple as…

…knowing that this so-called Real Life/world can never match up your super uber vivid imaginations, fantasy, dreams at night, and also your feelings.

To put it bluntly in other words, this so-called “Real Life/world” sometimes (or often?) doesn’t seem to allow much creativity, imaginations, and high-sensitive feelings.
It can in fact only requires you to be the aggressive, smooth-talking, and most importantly business/money/profit-driven or oriented.
So for the creative or ‘feeling’ type of persons/individuals, it can really seem like a hell lot of dull, bland, boring, “same ol’ same ol” stuff keep REPEATING from a day to another day, which can really at most extreme drives you nuts, insane. Not to mention when you have to be FORCED (or pressured) to deal with Real Life’s PROBLEMS and sufferings, which like I’ve said in my other previous post, it’s probably like 90% of our human Life.
It’s almost like a torture, even hell to these type of people.
This Real-life/world and society often seem to rewards those “Alpha-type” and aggressive, push-over kind of people, to rise into the top. no matter at what cost.
“Life is a competition” , “it’s survival of the fittest baby!” , that’s what they will often say to you, and then easily telling you to“suck it up”, “grow up”, “don’t be such a crybaby”, “hey, that’s LIFE!”, “stop being weird please” , etc etc.

It’s just a sad sad reality for us,..isn’t it?

So sometimes I do wonder, if this is what I will encounter in Real Life for the next 10, 20, 30, to 60 years of my Life, while probably full and filled with lots of problems, problems, pain and sufferings,…..then why should I continue living?…
It only make sense to just end it all, isn’t it?..

.
.
But then, the funny & somewhat ‘beautiful’ irony is this:
I’ve suddenly just realized that all the beauty of imaginations, creativity, and highly-sensitive feelings, that are often contained in the works of human’s Arts, music, poetry, paintings, sculpture, designs, etc…they’re all exist in this LIFE,..because these often ‘tortured-souls’ are LIVING.
Yes, because they *choose* to keep LIVING (and Connecting), then they can continue to compose, create what’s in their super-uber rich imaginative minds, NOT bounded by any Real-world’s (often obnoxious) restrictions and strict, rigid rules and codes.
And because they *choose* to keep living,…that now some of their arts & creations can really touch, inspire, and “speak” to some (or even many) of us here…!

All these beautiful, touching works of arts & creativity won’t ever exist, were if these individuals/persons choose DEATH over living..
Only by living, you can continue to create, in LIFE.

So maybe….these are some of the things that makes this so-called Real Life/world still *worth* living..