Family & Friends Effects

The effects of suicide on family and friends.

2

Asking For Help

  December 28th, 2017 by tryingtostayanonymous

The other day I told my sister about my suicidal thoughts, but she seemed sort of dismissive. I haven’t tried to act on them yet, and I don’t think I’m going to any time soon. But it was really difficult to tell her and it was sort of a cry for help. Like I said, I don’t really have plans to act on them, but sometimes I get into a really scary headspace where I’m really close, and I just want to stop feeling like this. I don’t think I could go to anyone else, and I can’t imagine trying to tell her again… Have you …

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8 months ago • Family & Friends Effects, General

15

The worst year

  December 23rd, 2017 by The Wrong Boy

So….man,that wont to be a good year,it’s not just for me but for everyone here in the blog,i know it has persons with more problems than me or we but i just don’t like to have these problems,my life is just a sadness history with so many pain and depression….and that are not just words but feelings…MY feelings,and now my feelings are so sad….downed…btw,here…do you know Christmas?..Yeah,it’s what’s going to happen soon but now i already recived my gift AND i recived NOTHING….seriously,i just recived nothing,my 3 sisters just recived a fucking Tablet…..i don’t care about what they recived,but,man,i just need a good day,a good …

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8 months ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Stories of Loss

1

Punks

  December 19th, 2017 by lonewolf23

I hope nobody hurts my mom. She drives for Uber and she makes some nice money doing it. I just hope none of these butt-hurt taxi cab drivers do anything stupid that’ll piss me off. I understand that Uber and Lyft is kicking taxi bumpers left and right but there’s no need for these taxi drivers to take out their frustrations on my mom who isn’t trying to hurt anyone.  She’s just trying to make a living just like they are. My mom tells me stories about how taxi drivers ***** and complain to her about how they ain’t getting as many customers as before …

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8 months ago • Coping Skills, Family & Friends Effects, Rants

14

I think it’s time

  December 18th, 2017 by soundless scream

I had hoped to recieve a response from anyone that might be able to relate to my feelings of hopelessness or could share their experience as it related to mine. But I didn’t and I guess that’s alright. I figure you come into this horrid world alone, you walk through it alone, and I should expect to exit it the same. I know my husband will be devasted in every way humanely possible when I die because it will be him that most likely will discover my remains. I’m currently trying to figure out where in my home to do this. I’ve decided that I …

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8 months ago • Chronic Pain, Coping Skills, Family & Friends Effects, General

9

When I was Gay…

  December 14th, 2017 by lunachild

When I was four

My mom would squeeze me into a suffocating dress

With ruffles that would make me itch

Like pins and needles jabbing from every stitch

Until I ripped it off without a sigh

While a tear rolled down my eye

 

When I was seven

My mom would paint my nails

Colors of a blooming flower

And for that hour

She would restrain my small hand

Becoming as rough as the sand

Until it became dislocated limb

One I could never put back in

 …

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8 months ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Poetry & Art

2

That time of year

  December 14th, 2017 by dietcigarette

I feel like I’m going to implode if I don’t get this out somewhere. Here feels like the safest place. It’s gonna be kinda long, and a heads up for mentions of self harm and disordered eating, I guess.

Lately I’ve been preparing myself for what I’m calling my families own civil war. It’s been creeping up on us the past few years and this year is the year when everything is going to go to shit. My brother is likely being placed into foster care, my dad needs to move but everywhere is far too expensive, my grandma is dying and her medical bills are …

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8 months ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Rants

4

I was already bad, and then he died

  December 14th, 2017 by SunshinesBlackhole

So, I first wrote on here in 2013 talking about my budding depression.

I’ve had lifelong issues: chronic illnesses, abusive parents, bullying, many sexual assaults, death of family members, panic attacks, self-harm, suicide attempts.

I wrote in here when I was fourteen. I’m nineteen now, a sophomore at a good college. Decent GPA. I haven’t cut myself in years, I was seeing a therapist, on some helpful medication. I was better, never good, but better.

I had a bad breakup a few months prior. I was getting diagnosed with yet another a new chronic illness. I was estranged from my friend group because of said breakup, and my …

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8 months ago • Chronic Pain, Family & Friends Effects, Rants, Stories of Loss

2

there might be hope

  December 13th, 2017 by lovvely

note: This is very important. I want to share this and show that hope does exist.

 

so, hi.

Again, all of the sweet comments, were as my name says, lovely.

Thanks to the people who were concerned about how I’m being treated by others, and also the people who said they had also experienced depression or anxiety. It was very reassuring.

 

Today was shockingly a decent day, it’s not yet finished, and the night is yet to come, but maybe it’ll all turn out okay. Night is always the worst time for me, and probably the most difficult to get through. I try to sleep it off, but it almost …

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8 months ago • Coping Skills, Family & Friends Effects, Fun & Interesting, General, I Will Survive

7

What are you doing Chloé?

  December 12th, 2017 by chloe17

Its 12.30pm on a Tuesday morning, people my age are at work or school doing something meaningful with their lives yet here am I: Lying on my bed with no intention to make today worth it. I don’ t even know how I found the strength to type this. I have a job interview in a couple of hours yet I am wondering if I should go. I feel like doing nothing. Nothing interests me anymore. I have lost my appetite, my eyes are swollen from crying everyday.

2017 was one hell of a year. I graduated from college, I turned 24, got my first car, …

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8 months ago • Chronic Pain, Coping Skills, Family & Friends Effects, Fun & Interesting, General

1

being your illness

  December 12th, 2017 by onemorehour

 

 

i lost my grip about 5 years ago, i started thinking that everyone i loved hated me, that they would leave me, and so i pushed them away.

 

i had been through a lot of trauma with the people i loved, people we loved had killed themselves and as we always took life as it was a little harder than the rest, i thought they would understand, that they would stay by me as i had stayed by them, that they might help me out. they could not handle it and i manifested the abandonment through my paranoia and dramatic cries for help that no one …

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8 months ago • Chronic Pain, Coping Skills, Family & Friends Effects, Poetry & Art, Rants, Stories of Loss, Suicidal Survivors

4

who am I

  December 12th, 2017 by Drained-Blast

I’ve been around this project for a while but I did never have the energy to post, today’s am feeling bit better and that’s why I grabbed the opportunity to write.

I feel like having a whole population in my head, each person trying to make it theirs, looking from outside I have the best family and a prosperous future, but no one ever asked if I am really happy about it.

my parents ruined my life with their fucking ideal principles, : you should not do this, school before friends, school before hanging out, shcool school school and then school, ok I secured my future but …

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8 months ago • Chronic Pain, Family & Friends Effects, My Suicide Note

25

Empty Promises

  December 10th, 2017 by AZSAM

If you believe in God, I want to know why.  I’ve tried, hard.  It all seems like lies and empty promises.  I’ve done what was asked.  I followed the rules.  Nothing good ever happens.  The love of my life just walked away after 2 years.  I’ll never get over her.  She’s not perfect but sure as hell was perfect for me.  In every way.  For 2 years, I prayed, cried, kicked and screamed.  I begged God to find a way to put us together for forever.  Ultimately she decided God didn’t want us to be together.  What!?!?  He never talked to me about it.  Church …

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8 months ago • Coping Skills, Family & Friends Effects, My Suicide Note, Rants

0

Disorganized thoughts

Disorganized thoughts

  December 6th, 2017 by RiloMor

 

  • It’s not like I haven’t tried to speak my mind to, tell someone. In fact I have been hospitalized for my depression, 7 day lock up with medication and a councilor to ‘talk about it.’ But why did they believe me when I told them it was because of some random girl making fun of me for being gay and trans-masculine. I don’t know why I’m depressed, or why I panic when I’m near people or feel the need to just scream for no reason. Why did they think it was another person hating me when I was hating myself for not knowing why

…

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8 months ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, I Will Survive, Rants, Suicidal Survivors

1

Expectation

  December 3rd, 2017 by My Name Is

I have a 4.2 GPA. I am on the varsity swim team. I am an honors student right now and there’s not a single class that I’m taking that isn’t advanced. I have a good amount of friends and my teachers like me. I live in a good stable family it looks like with two parents that are still together along with a brother and a sister. My family can afford to go to the beach in the summer for the weekend and allow me and my siblings to have out own rooms. I have a seasonal job that paid really good this year and …

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9 months ago • Chronic Pain, Family & Friends Effects, General, Rants

11

Anxiety

  November 29th, 2017 by firefly11291998

I have  social anxiety as well severe depression and bipolar disorder. I was raised in a very christian family where any mental problem is made up. My dad does not accept it as a problem, but as a way for me to be trying to get attention. I have told him many times that if i was trying to get attention, he would not have spent days and nights in the ICU and the ER with me. Just waiting and hoping for me to wake up after another overdose. idk what to do bc he will never understand no matter how much i try to …

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9 months ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Rants

11

Everything in one post (Almost everything)

  November 29th, 2017 by Fuckedupworld

Well, uh I don’t know where to begin really. Here goes nothing.

I’m 17 years old, male by the way. I’ve not gone through much but that small, meaningless actions I went through shifted me into who I am today and brought me up to wander along the idea of suicide.
Now let’s get to the very beginning, ever since the first grade I had this cousin of mine who was the same age of mine, and our families decided to set us up on the same class.
She, yup I know, well she’s been a pain in ass ever since the first grade, hell I think she’s …

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9 months ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Stories of Loss

5

My story if anyone cares

  November 28th, 2017 by Max

9 months ago • Chronic Pain, Coping Skills, Family & Friends Effects, General, I Will Survive, My Suicide Note, Rants, Stories of Loss, Suicidal Survivors

1

My story of depression and sadness.

  November 26th, 2017 by Stacyissad

Um hi guys,i don’t know how to start this,but i will try.So im 13 and this is my story.My parents are strict.When i was 8 years old my mom was cheating on my dad.My dad found out and every night they were arguing and yelling,my brother was just standing there and i was trying to stop them from fighting,sometimes they stopped.But then one night they were arguing and my dad had enough and grabbed his gun(yes gun,he was a policeman) and thank god i took all the bullets out,because he tried to kill himself.Then everything changed when i was at school everything was

…

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9 months ago • Family & Friends Effects, General

2

Violently Stressed

  November 25th, 2017 by GerbzBaby

As I’m typing this I feel like having a meltdown at work. Every call, every person that I talk to gets me angry. I feel like taking my fist to a wall. I’ve become very moody and violent as of late because of family and friends. They don’t listen and my friends either replace me with someone else or obsess the fuck over my sister. I feel unwanted and I want to run from it. Hanging out with my shit ass friend didn’t help me becaus he just kept trying to get my sisters attention as I tried to make a conversation with him. …

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9 months ago • Family & Friends Effects, General, Rants, Stories of Loss

2

I found hope, some things are unexpected

  November 24th, 2017 by Jombo

Hello guys! I haven’t used this website in 2 years and seeing my older posts are quite a strange experience. I came here in 2014 because isolation and depression pushed me to the edge, rock bottom, or whatever. Started feeling depressed 10 years ago! It’s my Sadniversary and I thew up my birthday cake. My birthday was wednesday and I had a violent indigestion, because why the hell not.  Well this feeling persists, yet again. The reason I’m here today is because even if I do feel this pain, this need to die, this very heavy weight of self shame and being worthless, it is …

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9 months ago • Coping Skills, Family & Friends Effects, General, Stories of Hope

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