General

For general topics related to the site.

5

I Don’t Want to Exist Anymore

October 15th, 2017by fuckexistence

I’m sorry I exist, I apologized to my mother not even an hour ago. Her response was, I wouldn’t go that far. How far Mom? As far as to cease to exist? It would be so much easier, to just cease to exist. Taking a life seems so dramatic, it’s effects long lasting. Ceasing to exist is much more simple, one just doesn’t anymore. No one is hurt, no family, friends, or co-workers. If anything, they’re actually better off; they never actually had to deal with me and my bullshit. I never disappointed them or let them down or hurt them in any way, shape, …

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0

October 15th, 2017by noah5678

I really hope I die before the end of 2017. I just can’t handle the thought of having to live for 60 or more years, and I don’t even  want to live another ONE year.

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14

How not to kill yourself 2.0 (Anti-freeze)

October 15th, 2017by defalt120

It happened after my 7th attempt, I was desperate and intrigued to Attempt again. My parents suggested we head to the mall, on my way to the car I found something that got me excited. There was a big Anti-freeze container sitting outside In our neighbors doorsteps. Now Ive been researching my crap for 3 years so I knew damn well how dangerous that thing is. The next day after that I told my parents I’m taking walk outside, little did you know I went to grab that antifreeze and dashed as fast I could without getting seen by anyone. I went behind the church …

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8

He beat me up again today…

October 15th, 2017by stupidgirl

I don’t remember how long it had been since the last time.
And that makes me feel so happy.
It means I haven’t pissed him off.
I remember when it used to be more regular
Once a week
Several times a month
I would piss him off
But I’ve been so good
I haven’t said anything that might piss him off
Until today I said something stupid and it pissed him off
Yesterday I went to physical therapy because my body has been hurting all the time
I would never think that he’s the reason behind that…
But it’s gradual and it kept hurting more…
Yesterday provided so much relief for me
I got two 1-hour sessions and all …

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3

Apparently, all i have to do prove my humanity is answer this : Prove your humanity: 10 + 10 =

October 15th, 2017by Timel3ssDecay

Darkness, my old friend;

For how long have i tried to escape from you;

to run away from you;

Well, finally you’ve caught up to me;

Strangely enough, only within you did i find the light.

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6

……

October 15th, 2017by Foundhappiness

nothing new to say other than what I already have.

I get closer to it with each new day.

Thats all I know

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2

I don’t understand the point of living.

October 15th, 2017by deflagrat

Hi, I think that we live in a dissapointing world where nothing seems to make any sense. We are here just to be slaves of our sensations and nothing else. Life it’s unfair at it’s core, plagued with limitations and lack of opportunities, and afterwards there is nothing. I hope I am wrong, but I think we will never be anything more than a small meaningless existence.

In my case, I have never worked and without my parents I would be homeless and most likely dead (because of my own choice), and I already have 28 years. I despise the idea of just surviving working on …

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1

Change

October 15th, 2017by noroadsahead

This is the account I made 4 years ago on this site, but I never posted much. I did once but couldn’t put my thoughts into words, felt stupid, and eventually deleted it. I was a lurker. I’d read other people’s posts and use them to help me cry when I was so numb that I felt nothing. Crying was a good sign for me. At least that meant that some part of me was feeling emotion, some part of me was alive. Several years later, I am now in junior year of high school. I’m on zoloft and Prozac, but aside of that I’m …

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1

Maybe today

October 15th, 2017by MaybeElena

“Wish I would go back, I could go back to no-one

Wish I would go back, I could go back to nothing

Sweet oblivion”

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9

I don’t know why I wrote this

October 15th, 2017by PurpleK

Why am I still here? I should have done it already. 5 years ago, when I almost did it, I should have went through with it then. Where did surviving get me? More pain, more tears, more disappointment and self-hatred and betrayal.

I lived so that I could get everything I ever wanted, and see it was a foolish and naive dream to begin with. I lived so that I could realize nothing will ever make me happy.

It’s the truth, I got what I wanted. It arrived twisted into something awful, but still, how selfish is it that I came to resent it?

How is this even …

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7

Death on my mind

October 15th, 2017by cutediamonds

ok , so i am all set to die
nothing else is killing me , accident , robbers , illness nothing of their own
iam so envious of people who get killed or who do successful suicide

i am going to due with ligature compression method. been reading it intensively , seems like a quick death , some what painless too .

i don’t want my body to be found , so yesterday was risking around hills and areas for blind spot.

it was when i heard a soldier drowned and died on spot during training .
it was then i realize purple who should be dead like me …

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5

2 days..

October 15th, 2017by lostallhope001

My package is arriving in 2 days. It feels weird knowing that in 2 days I won’t be here anymore. I think I am ready

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4

October 15th, 2017by noah5678

NOBODY should worship/respect god. God is an ASSHOLE. That’s just my opinion. Not just to me, but to many innocent people.

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4

Everything I need

October 15th, 2017by corinao@protonmail.com

I ordered everything I need to do this. The last chemical was delivered this week. The journal I wrote for my husband is all but finished. I reserved the hotel room. The overnight bag is packed and personal possessions are cleaned out. It all seems so quiet and still. Will it stay this way through to the end?

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8

I’m not special.

October 15th, 2017by eviewiththebpd

Hearing people tell their meaningless stories makes me never want to share mine. It’s insignificant and pitiful, just like everyone’s. Hearing so many people drunkenly share their life stories last night in hopes of someone finding them special or caring made me realise just how stupid I am for wanting someone to care as well; I’m not special. I’m another needy, suicidal teenager. What a fucking cliche. My words will never mean anything, not now, and certainly not when I leave my suicide note on my bedside table.

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0

It’s just two days ago… I cut myself on my own right wrist. And today, there are over 20 cuts on each of my wrists.

3

Hacked, struggling, surviving

October 15th, 2017by CARLOSPEJUAN

I will make it. I’m having a lot of problems, but for the first time, I’m able, capable and willing even of feeling the will to be alive. I want to live for once and I already see the difference in so many of my actions. I fear my roommates are injecting me with steroids at night. I fear the problem was low T the whole time. But I am getting checked for that specific reason. 🙂

I know I can do this. I don’t know how or why I think I was actually hacked, and people were harrasing online. These people are now calling …

0

I’m Gordon Moorehead not some ruskie, chief.

October 15th, 2017by ME Thal

Way i see it: if you don’t like something change it. If you can’t change it, learn how to cope. If you can’t cope, kill yourself.

https://youtu.be/59yVdODIrDI

1

Meaning of life.. In perspective

October 15th, 2017by Cause of Death: Suicide

Humans – akin to elephants, hippos, donkeys, kangaroo, alpaca, koala, yak, giraffes, mules, Zebra, horse, cow – will have one baby at a time

Humans – akin to a close approximation to Elk, gorilla, moose, and cow have a gestation period of 240-280 days

Human females – akin to mule deer, cougar, orangutang, spotted hyena, big horn sheep, Javan pig, jaguar weigh on average 58-73kg

Human males – can also be weighted close to sloth bear, addex, mountain goat, bearded pig, reindeer, Asiatic black bear

1

Ever Ready Death

October 14th, 2017by Gary

The saga continues. More medical crap. CT scans with dyes, mri’s, under the knife getting whittled away at. Biopsies, and more whittling. Suture’s, scars, bandages. Wishing that this time under the knife might be the last time I close my eyes and can fade away forever. More doctors, more findings. Fuck. Sorry…I know. But sorry. I just about cant take this too much longer. I’m breaking apart inside, self destructing cells are turning on me. My solace from all of this is, that I’ll be that man, sitting in an airplane, peering out the window into a world I’m not a part of.  Knowing that this is a …