General

For general topics related to the site.

6

I’m ashamed

  January 13th, 2019 by Spottedjaguar

I’ve had depression/anxiety as a result of childhood trauma for over 15 years. This is the first time I’ve ever posted about this, anywhere online, not because I haven’t wanted to but because I’m so ashamed. I’m ashamed about a lot of things. Things I’ve done to keep myself safe (I’m in a long term and positive relationship with my first and only lover, because it’s taken me years to trust someone that much to allow them to get close to me, physically and emotionally). I’m ashamed of being a yoyo of emotions and randomness, sometimes depressed, sometimes anxious, sometimes suicidal, sometimes doing ok. I’m …

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7

My Suicide Story

  January 13th, 2019 by hurtlittlegirl

I’m perfect. I have the body every girl wants, I am crazy smart, and I play a lot of sports. I was only in the seventh grade and I would wake up 5:30 everyday, even on weekends just to go to my volleyball, boxing, basketball or whatever it was sport practice. I got 80% or above in any subject, and I actually understood what the frick I was doing in my math class. I had friends, a loving family, and I lived in a community that loved and accepted me for who I was.

I hated it. I wear clothes that fit in my breast area …

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5

I am a damaged human being

  January 12th, 2019 by Black Holez

It seems ever since I lost my closest friends, it’s like something has been taken away from me that makes me like a functional human being. Compounded with this is the fact that I was bullied out of work and no justice was done that led to my depression. To my girlfriend of 14 years, I’m sorry that I’m unable to provide you what you want. I’m a failed human being whose emotions are being torn inside because of the loss of people that were important to him. This is why I think the monastery route is for me. At least I can be of …

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10

Is there justice? (Analysing BESTGORE material)… (answering @Soda) (Excuse the expletives)

  January 12th, 2019 by Two-Faced

(For context: I’m a little drunk hence my lack of etiquette)

Growing up I understood that there is no power stronger than destruction. My willpower was crushed by a man who made me realize that hateful strength is all that matters. I turned my body into a tool of destruction, grinding everyday dreaming of the time I would land my fist on his stupid face. And when I did… all he did was smile. I was too late. The world had beaten his soul before I could and now he was defeated; you can’t hurt such a man… he died a long time ago. So how …

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2

Proud but damaged

  January 12th, 2019 by Urm8451n

My last visit in this site was back at the end of July where I wrote about my instinct to seclude and be alone.

Today I want to tell you guys good news. Although I’m still a student, struggling financially and having problems at home.  I did succeed to get a good paying student job at Intel Corporation as a software developer.

I am still dealing with a lot.  I’m still suffering from abdominal pains.  But I don’t let anything remove the smile off my face.

 

I wish life has been easier, but I guess that’s how life goes.  And I also assume I need to accept the …

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22

I like the idea

  January 12th, 2019 by princessmousy<:3)~

Man Puts Up Website and Photo Memorial of His Life Before Committing Suicide

Anyone remember Martin Manley? He created and left up a website before he killed himself. He relies on family members to keep the website up. I was thinking of doing the same. His reasoning for creating the site was in the article. Ps: look up martin manley suicide website in a search engine after reading the article, the link provided in the article didn’t seem to work for me.

I have many deterrents (one is this damn thing called hope) but I worry about something else. What if people look through my stuff when I die? I guess I’ll have to destroy everything. I don’t really …

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3

Could someone please answer?

  January 12th, 2019 by EduardowasHere

What will happen to my body?

I do not find meaning in life, I struggle to be someone and do good things for others, but I always end up doing the opposite.

I have no sense of life, if I were braver I would have finished my existence in my last 4 suicide attempts.

This time is different, I have a weapon and the agony will be less, I only have one question

What will happen to my body? I will not carry any identification, I will die alone, in another state far from where I …

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0

Anyone heard from IronWolf?

  January 12th, 2019 by psgalaxy

I have not known this guy personally but every post he made resonated with me as I was feeling exactly the same. He posted something every month or multiple times a month until June 2018. Does anyone know if he’s okay by any chance?

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3

Im a loser

  January 12th, 2019 by NO_REMORSE

Im a loser

Im an addict

I dig my own grave

Im a scumbag

Im confused

Im lost

Im gone

Goodbye.

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3

Life’s something..

  January 12th, 2019 by richies

Well, you folks have many reasons why you wanted to die or to cease existing. But, you folks say that suicide will be the greatest mistake someone can ever do to themselves, right? What about a number of people that the society wanted to get rid of? If you say that the family and friends will be sad and all that stuff, but this case is different. THEY ARE HAPPY IF THAT PERSON DIES. How do you think about that?

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19

Dreamin

  January 12th, 2019 by PatheticMale

I have woken up at 3.15 pm. Again. That means I was sleeping for 14 hours. Damn. Idk why do I sleep that long sometimes. Its probably some defense/coping mechanism of my body. I normally never have dreams coz I smoke so much weed. But when I sleep this long I have them. I dream of having a better life. I dream of having someone that loves me.

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11

Stock Market

  January 12th, 2019 by Soda

Despite the hard times I’m going through right now, the one thing that really warms my soul and gives me genuine hope that I can turn my life around is the stock market. I follow it daily and I’m reminded that I could’ve profited had I gotten in.

However the problems in my life are preventing me from making trades unfortunately otherwise I would’ve been doing well already. From sleep loss, to family or financial issues, I keep dealing with things that are keeping me away from trading.

Over the years I’ve gleaned a great deal of wisdom about the market but unfortunately I haven’t been …

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35

squeak2

  January 12th, 2019 by princessmousy<:3)~

*picture of mousy and me (another mousy :P) removed by the mouse god*

My dear sweet mousy <3
Ps: Sorry if this post bothers anyone. You can always skip it…

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11

Some questions

  January 12th, 2019 by Tellmewhy

Are you a selfish person?
Are you a cold person?
What about others? How you see other people?
I like to ask and to answer personal questions. Why don’t people like personal questions?

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1

Not Good Enough

  January 12th, 2019 by Rzr97

About 70% of my thoughts are devoted to blood. Specifically, my blood. I can’t stop thinking about the times I was almost deep enough. During the actual moments of cutting, it always feels deep enough. Sometimes it feels too deep. I cry out in my head “god it hurts stop, you are going too far!” and then I look at myself and am filled with disgust. You see, I don’t cut to die, I cut because it gives me self worth—or at least, it is supposed to. It never quite works out that way. I always feel pathetic for not cutting deep enough after the …

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0

Cat Stevens – Trouble

  January 12th, 2019 by Taf Taf

Lyrics:

Trouble, oh trouble set me free

I have seen your face and it’s too much, too much for me

Trouble, oh trouble can’t you see

You’re eating my heart away and there’s nothing much left of me

I’ve drunk your wine, you have made your world mine

So won’t you be fair, so won’t you be fair

I don’t want no more of you, so won’t you be kind to me

Just let me go where I’ll have to go there

Trouble, oh trouble move away

I have

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14

Angry, frustrated, tired

  January 11th, 2019 by Mac-10toSchool

Dick’s Sporting goods is a five minute walk from my apartment. I’ve been saving up for a gun or two from there. I’m so damn frustrated with people I can even describe it! But, I’m even more frustrated with myself.

I’ve been thinking over things, and the more I think about it, it makes more sense to just off myself instead. You are all right; the world already has too much pain and suffering in it. I wish I could show them. If the whole world could see the soul behind my eyes, everyone would flinch in terror. Maybe it’s that I dont have a soul …

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5

Seperation anxiety

  January 11th, 2019 by Hope Dream Love

Is it possible……im not even sure how to word this question….umm…..what if you love someone is it possible you dont actually love them and its just your seperation anxiety making you believe that you love them? That was confusing but i dont know how else to word it.

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1

Im an edgy fuck

  January 11th, 2019 by NO_REMORSE

Im an edgy fuck.

Im a *****.

Im useless.

Im a loser.

Sorry everyone.

 

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6

What comes next?

  January 11th, 2019 by heartlessviking

I know we have quite a few people here who desire to exit life. What comes after that exit?

Is it an afterlife? Is there a reincarnation? Do you think there is nothing?

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