i dont know what to do anymore.i cutt.i have tried to kill myself.i have don so many things.&& lied so many times.everyone at school hates me.&& they do so many mean things.its all me.i wish i could just die.just drop dead.replace richies life with mine.he was killed.&&& didnt wanna be.butt i wanna be.just please switch me & richie.please please please! i lie.im ugly.& fat.I JUST WANNA DIE !
It so hard that i cat take it anymore…and i now i shouldnt be saying this in the web but i did a lot of things wiht him that i was never supposed to do and thats why it KILLS me. I feel so used and i just cant do this anymore. To make it worse i had an incident when i was pregnant. I didnt know i actually was. What i ended up doing was killing my baby. MY OWN BABY!. I swear i didnt know, and i didnt mean to hit myself in the stomach. It was just all i ever did when […]
Hey I am Harmony, trying to start a band here, i am lead vocals. if interested go here and send me a message!
http://rottinginavacanthollow.bandvista.com/about-me/
Well, today my mama would have been 59, she died over 2 years ago. Supposedly from Alzheimer’s. I think she went crazy, and the medication helped kill her. I have nobody, she was my best friend. I find myself forgetting, and thinking “I gotta call my mama”, then I remember all over again. This wasn’t my plan, and I know it’s selfish of me, but I tried and almost succeeded to take my life in 2006. I just want to not exist. Happy Birthday, mama, and I hope the party goes on in Heaven.
I don’t know what to say or where to start. I feel stupid for even posting my personal stuff on an online forum. I have never been on an forum before. Anyway, all my trouble probably started from the age of 12 when i got really really sick. As a result of that, I had to stay at home and hospital for 3 years to recover, during which I had to follow strict diet and swallow heaps of pills/get injections daily. There were some horrible things happened that made me lost faith in humanity and made me struggle to trust other people. But I […]
It started the first week of April of this year when I started becoming extremely depressed. It was my first year of college and my first year away from home and it was difficult. I had no problem making friends though, I had the most wonderful support group at school! We were inseperable. After Easter though, my roommates Dad passed away from an illness and things were really difficult for her. I tried to be there in every way possible. We talked every night and I tried to make sure that she was alright. From my experience with death in reletives is to just be […]
Today is my birthday and I’m 25. While others feel lonely when no one else is around, I feel most lonely when I’m around my family. I have OCD and they all know this. I don’t know why I care about what chair I sit in, or what order things go in, but I do. The worst part is that they know, and it wouldn’t be so bad if they just didn’t care, but it’s like they go out of their way to torture me about the things I care about, and then laugh when I get mad. My parents never hear […]
I was going to commit suicide. But then I relized that I can escape this world without killing myself and that its not worth it because I could be someone one day.
I listen to death songs, I like watching a movie that involves a suicide. Recently I saw boy interupted a story about a boy who commited suicide by jumping out a window. Everyday I think about death, I dont sleep well, I dont eat well, whenever I eat I feel like throwing up. When I cut myself or try I dont feel anything , especially with an elastic I dont feel anything . I always dream about my funeral and I dont know why. Some people are always seem to worry about me . At work a girl told me I look depress of life […]
All my life I have been alone.  Never really feeling that I fit in.  I have always felt like someone looking in on others’ lives.  “This” has never been real for me.  Every time I think that my  life is ready to begin, it is ripped from me… always back to the same routine of loneliness.  Is this really all there is???  Is there ever really gonna be a pot of gold at the end of my rainbow.  I have come to the realization – no- there is no pot of gold.  This is life. This is all you get…  I have no plans […]
I feel so horrible at the moment, so many things are going wrong in my life. I just cant take it anymore. I need something to cheer me up, make me laugh, anything. Please help, I need it.
I don’t know folks… I just find this song by Lennon to be very comforting. I’m not a Beatlesmaniac or a big fan of Lennon, a bit old for that. The words, just the words…regardless of who wrote them, That person has to know how it feels to understand the world we live in…Â
 As soon as you’re born they make you feel small
By giving you no time instead of it all
Till the pain is so big you feel nothing at all
A working class hero is something to be
A working class hero is something to be
They hurt you at home and they hit you at school
I think I should say this off record.
Dear Destiny.
You are the best thing to happen to my life.
You are the only reason I decided to live past that year.
You despise me now.
But you will be in my heart.
Forever.
I love you.
I am constantly unhappy. My boyfriend is the source of my unhappiness. I can never leave him because in my mind he was my first everything and I love him and will die without him. No one understands what I am going through, they say I am weak for not just dumping him and living my life. I can never leave him and when he tries to leave me I want to kill myself. He is with me but always says it’s over and he has cheated and fucked me on the same day and I have so much honors classes homework that I can […]
i dont want to deal with all the shit that has become my life
i dont want this anymore…im tired of trying to be someone when im no one
im tire of trying to impress my family into loving me
im tired of being the freak
im tired of being the one who never felt like i belong
NOT EVEN IN MY OUN FAMILYS HOUSE DO I FEEL LIKE I BELONG
not even when i hear something thats sopose to mean something do i feel like it could ever be true
i always try to feel IM TIRED OF ALL THIS, IM TIRED OF FEELING […]
Hi. I am Melissa. I live in Fl…for the past couple months my life has been turned upside down then dropped face first for laughs. I am only 20 and know that the feeling i have may one day past…but for a 20 year old women…I have been threw a lot! I met the love of my life at a friends houses a year and a half ago. She was the most beautiful women i had ever saw in my entire life. 2 weeks ago she broke my heart and moved out… to make things better my 14 year old brother is being charged […]
Very recently homeless in Seattle, mainly due to the economy, but I’m sure that a doctor  could add a large heaping of ‘depression’ to the list.  No drug or alcohol problems, I am an IT Pro/Geek and have been drugged screened for many positions over the years and have a beer or two when the Steelers are playing on TV, but that is about it. Went through a serious back injury years ago that killed my career, marriage and financial security. EVERYTHING that I had what to hospitals, doctors and PT to get myself back into shape so I could live a ‘normal’ physical life and I achieved that, but did not recover […]
there are times in life where you just have to suck it up.
but there are times where you need to stand up for yourself.
life is very difficult but the harder life is, the more successful you’ll be in the future.
like ive said before ive lived a really rough life, and i have delt with all the pain that has come to me.
ive had people tell me they dont want me living and the only thing i can think of is ending my life.
there is only one reason why im still living today.
because of a beautiful little girl **Natalia Nevaeh**
Still alive. A couple more days to make my choice. I’m calm now. I can cope with my anger. I just wanted a friend. I can just put on my happy face now, that’s normal. I sit in bed. In my small 2-bedroom apartment and I just can’t sleep. I just think about how lonely I am, how everyone around me glows with self-indulgent happiness. I just want to make them suffer sometimes. But that wouldn’t be fair at all. My life sucks, they know it, and it’s not their problem. Death is my choice this month. Next month I decide. Wonder what happens when […]
On April 12 of this year my best friend committed suicide. I feel the constant guilt of not saving her…because I had the power to and I chose not to use it. A week before she did this, she told me that she had wanted to but her boyfriend, (who is now one of my closest friends) had talked her out of it. So I assumed it was just teenage drama and ignored it. A few days later she had texted me and she was asking for advice with her problems. I did the best I could and told her how sorry I was and […]