General

For general topics related to the site.

5

goodbye

  September 16th, 2018 by Hope Dream Love

ever sit there having a conversation with someone and you’re vague. not really saying much. in you’re heart you know you are saying goodbye but they have no idea. they don’t know you are just going to randomly stop talking to them. or that you feel its your time to finally leave everything behind. that nothing matters anymore because life is pointless.

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6

  September 16th, 2018 by OFFTheShadows

May be commit suicide is the wisest thing to do.

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4

I’m defective

  September 16th, 2018 by 678543212

Something wrong with me anyway. I always knew that; everything that has ever happened to me is only karma for my existence really. I’ve deserved ever ‘injustice’. I’m impure and filthy and disgusting and deserve to feel ashamed. But anyway, that’s old news. New news. My ex boyfriend told me last night after I told him I had plans to kill myself (I only told him because I was trying to go back on it, decided against it). He told me I tell him every month. I can’t remember ever saying any shit. But apparently 2 nights ago we were all out drinking I told …

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0

Run Away..

  September 16th, 2018 by NoBuddy

Why do you run run run, never stop?

Too committed, you aim for the jackpot,

Ready to sacrifice everything for your job,

But you’ll end up LONELY, you’re only so LONELY..

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3

Lord please help me

  September 16th, 2018 by chloe17

The last time I was on this site was Dec 12th 2017, almost exactly 9 months ago. I wrote an article of how much i wanted to die. Nothing much has changed since then. The feeling is the same.

I now have a job but i only go because i have bills to pay and each day is a struggle for me to leave my bed in the morning. I have used up all my sick days at work and all my vacation days yet I still find excuses to miss work whenever I can just because it brings me no purpose and it doesn’t change …

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3

  September 16th, 2018 by jr.

the best part about dying is that you have to wake up for nothing anymore. you get to sleep forever, and ever, and ever and ever

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4

High school

  September 16th, 2018 by PatheticMale

God I hate school so much. Its the worst thing in my life byfar. I always think about killing myself in school, or I think about posts that I will post here. Most of the time I feel like Im about to start crying hysterically but the tears never come so I just stare into nothningness with my eyes so empty that my face expression is scary. I hate teachers. They are so fking arrogant, they know they can do anything to me, they can bully me and I just have to accept it coz I need to pass. They enjoy demonstrating their absolute dominance …

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6

What if it’s not really about us?

  September 16th, 2018 by Yoges

I’m into The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins on and off these days. It presents this interesting idea that we humans, and all other macro-organisms – animals, plants, birds, fish, insects – are just temporary, short-lived vessels to be used by long-lasting genes in their journey through billions of years. We are only containers that have evolved from the primeval soup that was the first habitat of ancient genes, only to serve the same old purpose – transport the genes to next generations. They are the star cast and we’re not even the extras – we’re fucking props on stage.

The reason why I thought this …

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7

Screw entertainment about depression

  September 16th, 2018 by endlessmonster

There’s a lot of talk about Bojack Horseman right now. I haven’t seen it, but seeing all these people say they “get” depression because they watched a cartoon horse for a few hours seems super regressive. Like, these things that glorify depression only stand to trivialize the feelings of us who actually deal with it to the point where we’re posting on this board. People think they understand but when they’re faced with us for whom this is a bleak, inescapable reality, they still don’t give a fuck as always.

anyway, am I off-base here? what do others here think? This doesn’t only apply to that …

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1

People

  September 16th, 2018 by midnight1234

We all want to disappear at times. But sometimes I’ve noticed that the people I care about don’t really care about me. That if someone were talking shit about me they would either join in or stay silent. I tried to explain to them how I feel, and a few tried to understand. But for the most part they just kind of shut me out. So I decided to stop talking about it. But it’s hard not to talk about the things that control your life to the people you care about because they won’t understand and because they just put up with me. I’m …

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2

ready

  September 15th, 2018 by iwishicould

hi.

i am ready.

ready to go.

ready to leave.

i feel this calmness. i feel almost empty. but not in a bad way. in a relaxing way. it’s weird tbh. but it feels right. this is what it feels like to be ready. i’ve been suicidal for about 7 years and i’ve had some pretty bad days when suicide urges were sky high but it was never like this. i wasn’t ready then. but now… now i am.

i wanted to make this post so i can kinda leave my footprint in the world you know? i wrote my suicide notes but i still have things to say but …

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4

I Think I Might Be Done

  September 15th, 2018 by LiquidHuman

Lately, I’ve been feeling emotionally exhausted and stressed for weeks on end. I feel like I’m constantly treading water. Like I’m in an ocean, being pulled under by the waves. Gasping for air every time I can lift my head out of the water. Once in a while, I’ll choke on the sea as it fills my esophagus with salt water. The pain nearly unbearable.
The worst part isn’t the choking feeling in my lungs, or how sore and broken my limbs are from fighting to keep from drowning. The worst part is the parasitic thought that cements itself in my head. That maybe I’d be …

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4

wow

  September 15th, 2018 by jasal

it’s almost my fourth anniversary on this site. i still want to die, but obviously i’ve been too weak to just go through with it. isn’t that funny. i hope i don’t wake up tomorrow!

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2

I am tired.

  September 15th, 2018 by Engie

I wrote a suicide note once. Only time I ever did. I wrote it right before what I guess you could call my first real attempt. It was only three words long.

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2

I’m feeling bad. Anytime I feel like that I’d prefer to be dead. I am weak and also powerless. I am alone. My head is trembling. Even my Tummy is kinda shaking softly. I’d like to feel for once to have reached where I belong. A Home, … People? Do I have to feel?

  September 15th, 2018 by Yikrens

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3

  September 15th, 2018 by Robert Hulk

Imagine a future where everyone can create their own world. What do you think?

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2

Skalkottas’ music

  September 15th, 2018 by Taf Taf

” In music the passions enjoy themselves. ” – Friedrich Nietzsche

 

Nikos Skalkottas (1904-1949) was one of the greatest composers of the 2oth century classical music – I personally place him next to Kurt Weill and Igor Stravinsky. It’s a shame that nowadays most people (especially here in Greece) don’t know his work. Here’s the wikipedia page about him:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nikos_Skalkottas

 

I should write what are the names of the compositions and the songs in this video and where the photos in it are taken.

36 Greek Dances

00:00 – 01:23 Epirotikos – photos from the region of Epirus in Greece.

01:24 – 03:22 Kleftikos – photos of various Greek mountains.

03:22 – 05:16 Tsamikos (An Eagle) – photos …

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1

A shitty night

  September 15th, 2018 by noairtobreathe

So many times over the past few years I’ve been suicidal. I know it becomes really bad when I come here. I went out tonight. I never imagined when I was younger that I would have friends that cared about me. I know now my family really does care. But somehow I still don’t. I still have the urge to end my life. It gets better and then I trip off something and I feel the need to end it all. To take away my thoughts. I really wonder what my purpose on this earth is for. I don’t feel like I have one. I …

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2

It’s just a game, but I’m so hard on myself for not being good enough

  September 15th, 2018 by Beneathetide

I feel dumb for making this post but I don’t know why this has been making me feel so bad lately. I started playing World of Warcraft in July, and I absolutely love it, but I’m still such a newb compared to my husband and his friends. We often all play together, and naturally I don’t do as good as them and it sometimes feels like they expect me to suddenly be an expert with years of experience. It doesn’t help that yesterday I overheard them talking about how I didn’t do good. I mean they do make an effort to help me and include …

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1

week ago

  September 15th, 2018 by ANONFORWOOD

I do not know why i did this, cuts on my veins and my hands, i should’ve hidden. I couldn’t, so many questions, i had to lie about accidents didn’t happened,today they treated me like disabled innocent child, it hurted, i had to talk myself in cooler while others possibility hearing me, this looks people give me i don’t want to deal with it, they clearly let me know I’m wierd,  their look on their eyes i know it, i can not resist it,  why am i going through all this, can’t i be just normal human being for day. Seeing all this fake smiles on their faces, even my sister, i don’t know, i can not argue i’ll be wrong, if only death will end rhis all, winter is coming, i feel it is what i need. Just one more winter. Please I truly want it.

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