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October 13th, 2017by whiskered-fish

If reincarnation is real then I’m going to be pissed.

I don’t even want to live one entire life, let alone several. Fuck that noise. Give me Heaven or give me an eternal dreamless sleep. Just don’t make me ride this carousel of bullshit a second time.

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October 13th, 2017by SleeplessMind

Was it Shakespeare who began a quite saying “sleep.. Those little slices of death” (he went on to say how he loathes them, but I welcome them.
Went hearse shopping/casjet shopping today.. Yeah, I’m cool like that..
Fact- a casket is far more padded and comfortable than most beds

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17 years

October 12th, 2017by peoniesss

next Wednesday is my birthday and I will turn seventeen. normally on birthdays you get to spend them with your family and friends. but I don’t even know if I want to do just that. my mom is back on her cycle of taking pills with fireball and my brother is a ticking time bomb waiting to blow. I wish I could have a birthday like it used to be when I was little and my life wasn’t complete chaos. the only good thing going on is the fact that I am falling hard for this boy. he seems to see such good in me …

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October 12th, 2017by eternaldarkness

Crap. I took some (natural) Burn Blend capsules I had. It didn’t say it had caffeine in the list of ingredients but it must’ve had something because I’m all jittery right now. That’s the only new thing I took today. What natural thing can I take to calm the jitteriness? It’s crazy two little pills can cause such an immediate effect. I don’t normally take anything other than supplements. I don’t even drink coffee. It feels like a red bull (took that once, never again), except instead of energizing, it’s just making me all jittery and heart …

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Looking for Soco

October 12th, 2017by lookingforsoco

I am looking for a user on here, goes by the name Soco.  If you happen to know them or you are still around, please message me.


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Checkmate i lost

October 12th, 2017by Jmann66

Tell you guys a story when i was about 4 or 5 i used to have an reacurring dream where i would instantly fall asleep and this dark tunnel would appear but it wasnt a dream it was a tunnel to hell and demons around me and i could never wake up it was so dark and evil for weeks the same shit never ever did i forget that and now 39 i wonder did that act was it a curse that has followed me my whole life as im ready to end it if i die will that same tunnel be there waitng i …

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Campo de’ Fiori by Czeslaw Milosz

October 12th, 2017by PurpleK

Someone else will read
of the passing of things human,
of the oblivion
born before the flames have died.

But that day I thought only
of the loneliness of the dying,
of how, when Giordano
climbed to his burning
he could not find
in any human tongue
words for mankind,
mankind who live on.

Someone was asking about suicide notes and it made me think back on this poem by Czeslaw Milosz. I swear it sounds better in my language… it’s meant to be about war and sacrifice, but what I see here is death. So for awhile, I was gonna leave this snippet as my suicide note. In my language it’s more like ‘In any human tongue, …

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I’m so fucked up & I don’t know how to recover from it

October 12th, 2017by D2DA

My life is so domestically fucked up, I’m still irked at how I’m functioning even when I’m gone through all the shit that I’ve went through. This past year has been a traumatic year. I’m bisexual and I was raped by a 50 year old gay guy – that led me to getting PTSD, disassociating from myself, and spiraling into decline…I broke up with my girlfriend because I was convinced that I was gay and that I didn’t need love because I didn’t know how a person could love after being violated so badly. After that, I went through a myriad of same-sex encounters that …

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Wake Up

October 12th, 2017by Katki

Lied to the doctor ..Told him, I feel great, mood is good, sleep is good, all I know is that I want off of these damned meds once and for all… I’ve lost over 20lbs since I came off the last ones and I’m not in a fog. I fucking hate being a zombie .. just to survive?? That’s not good enough anymore.

I am so fucking lonely it hurts to breathe.. I can’t figure out what to do – I’ve tried to ‘put myself out there’ and the one connection I managed to make doesn’t seem to want to talk to me.  The crying starts …

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October 12th, 2017by theblackveal

Sick of unreliable people.

When people say things to be nice, but don’t follow through it really makes them an A$$hole.

Don’t offer help if you don’t plan to help.

If you can’t do what you said you will do, stop saying you will do it.

Be a person of action and a person of your word.


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Any experience with St. John’s Wort?

October 12th, 2017by PurpleK

Today I bought St. John’s Wort tablets, which apparently help with anxiety and ‘low mood’. I wasn’t really aware that there was non-prescription medication for depression, so as I’m not in the position to seek professional help, I figured I’d give it a shot. I was wondering if any of you have tried it? I’ve seen mixed-reviews on the internet and a lot of warnings for side effects.

On a different note, I feel horrible. Haven’t been eating, my flatmates probably think I’m an antisocial freak, and every time I go out with the few friends I’ve made, my brain shuts off and I can’t think …

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If I Could Rebuild My Life

October 12th, 2017by hadenough636

If I could rebuild my life I could probably be persuaded that life is worth carrying on for. This is the current state of my life, in no particular order:

  • I’m 41 and live at home with my parents.
  • I suffer from gangstalking, Voice 2 Skull (voices and sounds played into my head which are designed to mimic Schizophrenia) and Direct Energy weapons that can make my muscles twitch and it feels like hot needles are pressing against my skin which causes short bursts of physical pain.
  • I haven’t worked for 2 years because of the targeting.
  • I spend most of the time in the

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Should I write a suicide note?

October 12th, 2017by peach

I thinking about that, but whenever I want to write something I don’t know what.
Will you guys write something?

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First time poster

October 12th, 2017by pt9124

First time posting to a suicide board.  I’m not bad enough off yet to actually do it (probably 30 years out I guess.)  But I have thought about death (my own and others’) all my life.  As an eight year old I tried to kill myself so I could go to heaven.  My life wasn’t bad, I just figured if heaven was so great, why wait?  My mom stills tell the story (I hid behind a mailbox and jumped in front of a car, but I jumped out to early and the car stopped) and she always says “he didn’t know you couldn’t come back.”  …

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October 12th, 2017by wanttodie2

Does anyone else gets really high on zolpiden? When I wake up I can’t remember anything.

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Im free

October 12th, 2017by ??????????

Im n9t bound to any expectations but to get better, which is a paradox, a fools wish. This is freedom in it self. I stop swimming i drown and im fine with that.

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Mother Nature is Pissed

October 11th, 2017by eternaldarkness

2017 hurricane season is about to break it’s 124-year-old record.
Tropical Storm Ophelia is about to become Hurricane Ophelia.
When that happens, it will be the 10th hurricane in a row.
The last time there were 10 hurricanes in a row, it was in 1893.

Not to mention the GIANT earthquake in Mexico last month.
Plus several smaller quakes still going on. They just had a smaller one 3 days ago.
And now wildfires are ravaging California.
There have been lots of fires in CA and everywhere lately, but this one is pretty bad.

And global warming is still a hoax to some dumb schmucks.

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Thought this might help more than just me

October 11th, 2017by judge_me_i_do

Having a very difficult time this week. So thankful for a therapist who finally gets it and knows how to talk to me. I thought I would share in case his words and perspective might help someone else too.


Every morning is worse and worse.

I can’t do this any more. Yesterday with my mom and dad was awful. I remember my best work mentor telling me years ago that people don’t commit suicide because they want to die, they commit suicide because they don’t want to live. I knew then what a true statement that was. I’ve been there before, but never like I am now.

I …

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Where is it?

October 11th, 2017by CARLOSPEJUAN

I think I’m crazy. I’m mad because I may never achieve my goals regardless of what I do. I have a headache. And I’m hungry but I’m lazy. Im so sad right now, but I know I can get out of this. I just need time. Hopefully I won’t get fired. There’s SO MUCH to do. I suck major dick at everything. I need to change. For the best. I can do this? Yes, I can do this. I hope I’m ok. That’s what I pray.

Apparently I’ve lost my mind. I thought I had left it in my head
I better go to bed try to …

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October 11th, 2017by SwishAL

Forever bound by expectations and mistakes

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