Category:

Stories of Loss

For those who have passed on.

I Think I’m Lost

by SillyMilly 10/18/2019

written by SillyMilly

My life is falling apart. I lost a partner for no reason, there is so much crap going on in my friend group and I got involved on the wrong side by mistake. Now if I tell anyone about it my social life will go down the drain. I lasted 4 years with minimal self harm, and then it was only bites. Recently though, I’ve started cutting myself. My arm is already slit up and I cant tell anyone about it. I know it’s wrong but somehow knowing the physical pain will heal and go away makes better sense and gives me a kind of […]

10/18/2019 0 comment

Am I as messed up as I think I am?

by icaaa123 10/16/2019

written by icaaa123

Ok so I’ll try and keep this as un dramatic as possible, as I hate melodrama. I guess I’m a pretty normal girl from a pretty normal English family, but lately I’ve been feeling like I don’t want to go on and it’s tough. Anyways, when I was 15, I was probs living my best life and starting to blossom out of my awkward pre teen all girls school nerdyness into a pretty social being. That summer my dad started to get pretty ill, he’d had depression all his life. I would be a bit dramatic to my then boyfriend I guess for attention, speculating […]

10/16/2019 3 comments

I’ve got nothing left to lose, but my life.

by FireFLook 10/14/2019

written by FireFLook

I’m shackled to it. I find it cruel.
I’m bound to every breath I take; it’s pain. How do I make it stop?

The walls are closing in, and if I am to deal with this alone, there is only one way out for me.

Alone?

I challenge, I dare, anyone to tell me differently. I have been begging for help for months— No, my whole life?

Cherished people I’ve loved are dead. People I once called friends, are gone. My despairing, tormented existence was too much to tolerate. It is easier for them to deny the problem exists (that I exist), than to offer their hand to me […]

10/14/2019 7 comments

dear n

by alone 1 9/26/2019

written by alone 1

Hey
Its be a while I guess
There was so many thing I would have wanted to say to to but I couldn’t
I won’t
I cant bear to loose you I guess
I was afraid
But now im not here
I guess its only fair and right for you to know these

I loved you
I always have

I know there were never a us
So I try my best to treat you well
Hiding my dark side from you
Try to be a good friend
Have you as a part of my own little family

But good thing can only last this long
Im getting tired

And […]

9/26/2019 3 comments

I have lost everything

by DeadAccount 9/11/2019

written by DeadAccount

I often say that I have an IQ of 50. It was proven to me after all. Anyway, yesterday was the day that it really shined.

I’ve murdered people before. By accident but I did it. On an old server me and my boyfriend used to go on, there was a person called Mei. One day he vented about how miserable he was. I tried to cheer him up, but in doing so made him feel worse. Worse to the point that he said he was definitely gonna kill himself now. He was never heard from again.

Yesterday I accidentally did the same thing […]

9/11/2019 4 comments

I will light myself on fire next week

by nohopeever 8/22/2019

written by nohopeever

Going to college has always been my dream but after 1 year I can’t afford it and I refuse to work my ass off in a minimum wage slavery job until the day I die. There is absolutely no happiness in this world without a degree and without the money that comes with it, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to serve stuck up pricks burgers for the rest of my life I REFUSE!
The financial aid office offers no help to independent students and my drunk deadbeat dad cannot cosign a single loan for me, and I have no biological mother in the […]

8/22/2019 12 comments

My family just forsake me

by deathberry 8/15/2019

written by deathberry

I finally confessed to my family about my depression and suicidal attempts. I always try to pretend to be okay around them and for five years I did my best trying to strengthen our bonds. I always did my best to keep planning activities together, slending more time, helping them with their troubles. I expected to have built up a little bit of good will. But they expresed apathy towards my depresion. They could no believe nor understand what I was talking about. Is like everything until now was a lie. Is painful. My confesion just destroyed my connection to them. I will never be […]

8/15/2019 3 comments

How I scared someone.

by ScaryButHarmless 8/3/2019

written by ScaryButHarmless

It first stated at the beginning of summer break. My friend from New York told me that goodbye meant she was going to kill herself. She said goodbye to me. I always had the mindset that I was the weak link in every type of relationship I’ve ever been in,whether it’s an unauthorized soccer team or just me meeting someone new. So when I was told that she was going to kill herself, I blamed myself for not being good enough, So I texted a friend, the kindest person from my class, she would always greet me, and would ask me stuff from time to […]

8/3/2019 2 comments

Erasure

by unsuperwoman 8/1/2019

written by unsuperwoman

I’m 28, and I want to die. The only thing that stops me is the pain it will leave behind. There’s no way to escape it. I don’t know how I could get these people that I care about out of my life without hurting them. How do you just stop well formed relationships? Recently, I’ve tried to take a detailed look into my past, into the type of person I have been. For 28 years I have felt sad and worthless with occasional moments of reprieve. I’ve tried a dozen different pills, psychiatrists, therapists, and I’m always right where I started in the depths […]

8/1/2019 3 comments

Us

by li 7/15/2019

written by li

As you lie there falling to sleep

I can’t help but think

what’s left to loose

I’ve lost you

many time

your friends said don’t talk to him

“maybe they are right”

what if they are right

what if me leaving is the best for you

for both of us

so I can get going

and you can get better

I don’t know why you are still here

for me

I don’t know why I’m cared for

I don’t deserve you

you are happier without me

I caused you troubles

pain

it’s just one step to one small step to take

by the train platform

just one small step

and I can’t hurt you anymore

just one more heart ache that you will get over

one more

i don’t know […]

7/15/2019 0 comment

all cliches false bullshit

by tiredunluckyasf 7/15/2019

written by tiredunluckyasf

i went through lots of shit. im the unluckiest person alive. i lost my parents. i lost my best friend. im always being bullied, and was borned with an ugly face and being autist and bipolar doesnt help. and when i always searching in the net, they just saying it gets better, just hard work(yes and i didnt mentioned business fails, its pathetic) and other stuff. they act they know the other person. and what if im cant be happy? what? i know i should be dead. and i will do it, but i just needed it, for last time.

7/15/2019 1 comment

again

by li 7/10/2019

written by li

here i go again
trying to say things
to make it all easier
to help hurt less when the day comes
being an asshole

another bottle
another sleepless night
the words of hers stuck in my head
ringing
i was just trying to do you right
but i can’t
learn from your mistake they said
i’m trying

i’m like a bomb but i’m constantly exploding
i was just trying to get you out of the blast zone

but i can’t
i need you here to hold down the switch to stop me from exploding
one last time

not enough tears can say i’m sorry

all of this just tells me

7/10/2019 0 comment

When will it stop hurting?

by strawberrycrown 7/6/2019

written by strawberrycrown

A year ago today was the last time I saw _____. It STILL hurts. Surely it can’t hurt that much for so long? I just want to know when will it stop hurting that ____ isn’t part of my life anymore. I think it hurts so much because ____ was my best friend and literally part of my family for her whole life and most of mine. A year ago _____ broke me. When I said goodbye to her it was really the last time. I tried for about 9 months to fix things to bring us together again but she didn’t care. Maybe our […]

7/6/2019 6 comments

just tired

by icantdecide123 6/22/2019

written by icantdecide123

my girlfriend recently passed and I have a hard time coping with it through the same drugs that got her killed. I accidentally overdosed with 4 xans and a bottle of alcohol and I was put in ICU with tubes down my throat. i’m just tired and so drained. my life is getting tiring idk what to do

6/22/2019 9 comments

what’s there

by li 6/21/2019

written by li

don’t go if you are not sure she said

but i’m never sure

i’m never sure of what is there tomorrow
if there is any tomorrow

i am replaceable
“no you are not”

maybe the memory are not
but the feeling is
the feeling you have on me
you can have on someone else

so i am replaceable
i dont belong here
someone else will take my place
someone better

i mean nothing to me

i’ve got to leave soon

so don’t make it more difficult

ive loved you kissed you, hated you
still im here

but i wish im not

i wanted to stay for you
i still do

but its too much

love.li

6/21/2019 0 comment

burnt out

by li 6/16/2019

written by li

they say its better to burnt out then fade away.
well I’m burnt out
but i wish i didn’t
i wish i faded away
finding my self at the side of the tube
taking that step
how easy would that be
how fast would that be
just that one step
and i would fade away

but right now
i’m in my bed
lost and sad
again
again
burnt out hoping to make others life better
to give all i’ve got
but there is nothing left
now i just fuck things up
throwing all i have left away
life is all there is left

the every next breath […]

6/16/2019 3 comments

Underweight and Underappreciated

by luna is sad 6/7/2019

written by luna is sad

When I was born, I had less weight on me then I was supposed to, and don’t get me wrong I understand other people went through this too. I also understand that people go through being teased and being taunted about their weight throughout their lives. But I want to help you understand what it’s like to be black and underweight. I am currently 13 years old, and I weigh 73 pounds. The average for a thirteen year old (f) is 82-137 pounds. Now I feel like you can believe what you want to believe when it comes to normalcy to 13 teen year old […]

6/7/2019 2 comments

Thoughts begin filling my head again…

by KeiraSmith1111 6/1/2019

written by KeiraSmith1111

So, if you didn’t already know, you are now the third person that knows about this, I don’t like to tell people unless they are really close or I end up upsetting them therefore id tell them. Well last summer in 2018 I had the worst months of my life, there were 2 weeks where I decided not to eat at all and got taken to the hospital. I was in a state of mind where dying was the most important accomplishment for me. I’d lost the one person who made me stronger and who made me, me. I spent months on end crying and […]

6/1/2019 2 comments

by Deadinside@1995 5/29/2019

written by Deadinside@1995

I am a 24 year old guy. This is for the first time I am writing something out of my heart so I will try my best to open up. Life has always been tough for me to be more specific it’s been one wrong decision after another. I was raped multiple times by by older cousins and others when I was a kid. I did not know what was happening, I was to young to understand or share my situation with anyone. As I grew older and realised I wanted to kill those people but I was too emotional and weak to do something […]

5/29/2019 6 comments

It still lingers

by Andyisbatman 5/28/2019

written by Andyisbatman

I am a suicidal survivor. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be, though. You think that once you have finally made it past being suicidal and depressed that you’ll always feel better; there are no simple fixes to being mentally broken. It’s not a broken bone that will one day heal. Even though I do not actively want to die, i’ll hear a song, or watch a show that I watched or listened to when I was hurting and depressed and I will spiral down the rabbit hole once more. The emptiness still lingers, and I still have thoughts. When a person becomes that […]

5/28/2019 2 comments

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