I have to end it now I cant stand breathing anymore. I’m going to make all my notes and from now on am going to spend my time making notes and looking for ways on how to end it. I’m sorry I just can’t fight anymore, I’m done….
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Im a mother of three. I wish that was enough to keep all the sadness and thoughts to end it away but it doesn’t. I actually feel they would be better off! I love them so much but I have no desire to continue. They r the only reason im still here though! I would miss them tremendously.
Ive neen hopelessly suicidal my entire life. I’ll never make anything of myself i tried. Im just waiting for deaths sweet embrace to end my suffering. I hate this shit. I hate tv, back pain, all I do is eat and im emotionally fucked up all the time.
I’ve been dwelling on different scenarios that could put me in the hospital. I know like between 50-75 people that would probably come see me, but there’s one person whose presence would mean the most to me. I’d want him there to hold my hand, talk to me, stay with me through it all, and if I were dying I’d want him holding me. I’d want him there so I could tell him how much I love him.
I’ve been in love with him for over a year, I honestly thought I’d be over it by now. He kinda knew that I liked him before, I […]
We all have a different pain threshold and I have exceeded mine. I have planned my suicide, I have written a couple of notes and I am just waiting till I am home alone and I will do it. I attempted suicide early in the week and failed. Self preservation is really hard to get over, for me it requires a lot of strength and at the time I was weak, crying, crying and more crying. But now I can feel I can get over it. I am almost looking forward to death. No more suffering or pain. I’m quite excited.
I succumbed to my depression and 2 days ago attempted to end my life….
a bottle of bourbon and a bottle of pain pills didn’t do the trick.
I lived………feel like shit though…..
whens this hurt gonna end?
Once again a friend ditched me for my sister, once again I feel left out. I don’t want to be alone on New Years.. It’s happened two years in a row. I want to be with those who love me. I thought I was going to change and be more outgoing this year but I guess that hasn’t worked out well for me.. I thought I had that courage. I haven’t changed at all. When will it end?
I hope everyone else is having a good New Years. You guys diserve it.
Happy New Year!
Today at work it is a casual attire day, so I wore my To Be or Not To Be soliloquy sweater. We had a client come in and our receptionist is on holiday, so I am the backup, and I am to greet and take care of the few clients that come in on New Years Eve. They saw my sweater and proceeded to ask if I had it memorized.
Is that the point of it, though? To be simply memorized? To be able to vomit up the words upon request? Why not ask me what it means? Why doesn’t the real point of it matter? […]
I want to cry but cant or even move. Fireworks will go off again soon. I did this to myself. I dated, i was weak, and i suffered and still am. Im not going to just meet someone thats just going to fall in place. Anytime soon even if we need it. Every partner i had, left. This one.. Im ready to go now.. And if i miss im just going to rip it out in agony and do it again. Well thata how i feel
Woke up this morning with that knot in my stomach again. That basically means today’s gonna be utter crap. Been thinking more and more about my end of life, starting to become a more attractive option. Part of me wants to just sleep and not have to wake up again, and another part wants to try and fight these feelings. The latter part is fading more and more each day.
Why does killing yourself have to be so hard? I mean methods. They’re so much work and I’m so tired anyway. Shouldn’t I have the right to die quickly and painlessly if I want to? Why does anyone else have the right to force me to stay alive? Why is every decision except this one considered sacred and inviolable? I’m allowed to do anything with my life besides end it. Why are DNRs only acceptable for some illnesses and not others?
For all of those who don’t have someone to say goodnight/good morning to them,
For all of those who hate themselves but wear the biggest smile out every single day,
For all of those struggling with addiction,
For all of those who don’t have someone to tuck them in at night and and hug them,
For all of those who think that they deserve nothing because they haven’t found their talents yet,
For all of those who think that they need to end their lives,
this is for you.
goodnight/good morning, you deserve it. I’m here for you.
don’t hate yourself, I like you. It’s ok to not smile once in a while. […]
What is it in people that keep them around? I see so much suffering, grief. Awful things- and I think- why do they keep on going? Why don’t they just end the misery?
Why haven’t I ended the misery. I’ve tried to be optimistic. These feelings will pass, the vice will loosen it’s grip upon my neck. And it does, for short while. But, for the past 2 years, the pain has been ever present. The desire to disappear grows with each hour. I look for a cure, for a reason to stay, but cannot find one.
I’ve been depressed since I was 7. I’m tired of always being tired, and sad, and depressed, and feeling shitty about myself, my life, just everything. I’m just a giant black ball of darkness… I’m tired of being tormented, of always being in pain. I wish I was “normal” and had a “normal” life and felt happy good feelings, instead of feeling like I’m dying all the time…
Have u ever seen a loser and talked with him then u can see me . I’m the real loser and gonna end life within some days. So wish me good luck
Is any one awake ? Can’t sleep?
I can’t find a stable feelings, I’m all over the place, I don’t have a desire to do anything I love any more,everything so bleak, I try to express myself maybe to help ease some aniexty,or escape from me… so I’m here constantly trying to think of what to say, to myself ..to you. When I try to reply to your post I’ll sit and try to relate in words, be supportive something to make a connect, but ill either draw a blank or start writing a paragraph and end up deleting anyway…I just can’t accept myself, neither can […]
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No one knows how much I’m suffering . And the ones who do tell me I’m too much. So what do I do?
I’ve been going about every day all by my self . And I am alone . All my thoughts get to me . Some days I stand outside and notice how beautiful it is and feel the warm sun and close my eyes and i somehow feel content in that moment , being by my self .
Whenever I’m going to hangout with someone , they end up making excuses to why they can’t hangout. I wish people would straight up tell me they […]
I’m here not for any confessions just to tell about me to this world and if even one person agrees who I am that’s enough for me
I’m a 20 year middle class boy who has faced many troubles infamily…from childhood days I have never seen my fathers love towards me he keeps on shouting and pin points a very small mistake to a large one.. I will be beaten up when I dont obey my fathers words for even a silly thing and my mom doesn’t even raise her voice against my father she reacts like “whatever my husband does is correct bcoz he is […]
I feel incredibly alone. I have no meaningful connections in my life. No one who knows who I really am. Because who I am is not ok. And I don’t know how to change it so that it would be ok. How to change what goes through my mind. And so I have to hide myself. Even from myself most of the time.
I want so desperately not to be this anymore. To be free of it. To be free of myself. But then there would be no me to be free. Is an end to all experience preferrable to this hole inside me? I guess […]