I found the one reason I keep my heart beating. The only person that makes me smile and be happy. He is the guy I have liked for over a year now. Turns out he liked me for about the same time. Actually he would kill himself if I died, and I’d do the same. He’s really nice, but has a bit of a weight problem. My friends all make fun of him because of it and his laugh. It really upsets me that not one of them care about the fact that I love him, and he loves me.
Tag:
Love
I have experienced too much pain and to little joy in my young life.
i have always feelt unease with myself since aslong as i remember but 3 years ago i had enough, enough of people mocking me or making me a laughing stock, i started to do something i never thought i’d do and that was planing my own suicide and even writing a big letter to people (Family at most) and 4 people that i have keep in touch with thanks to a suicidal chat.
Today its gone 3 years since i planed my suicide but i still havnt done it, im overwhelmed with guilt […]
I’ve been “struggling” with depression since I was nine; I’m thirty-three now. I have been on hundreds of medications and finished sixteen rounds of ECT (8 unilateral, 8 bilateral) in May. Long story short, things are not better.
I feel a huge amount of guilt and fear about leaving my husband behind, but I can no longer distract myself from the fact that I want it to end and it doesn’t seem that is going to happen. I have been severely depressed, unable to go to school, unable to even bathe, for three and a half years now. I love my husband more than I knew […]
i just don’t know what’s going on nemore
i’m a webdesigner and graphics artist, i love designing, i love drawing i love being creative, ever since i was a little kid i dreamt of doing what i love, making people happy by what i can create, by what i’m able to do.
i’ve been a freelance artist for bout 2 years now and i see that it isn’t anything like what i imagined/hoped it would be, people don’t care about your feelings, about your work.
i’ve sacrificed everything i have for my carreer, now finding out that i am absolutely not happy with what i am, with what […]
I… really don’t know what to do. Yesterday, I wrote a post that expressed my desire to no longer live, and yet, I find that something odd is holding me back. Between the wonderful comments yesterday and my family actually being nice to me despite me not even saying much to them, I was actually… happy. I was able to forget about my self- loathing and have a day where people… cared? Such a weird word for me to say. But, I woke up this morning coming down from my high from yesterday- to hear my brother expressing his love for his girlfriend, aka, the […]
The simplified version is just that i hate myself. I hate myself completely with no room for positive. I’ve tried going to get help, but i end up shutting them out. I am a despicable human being. With no purpose in life. I’m not contributing anything to this planet, my family, or anyone else’s life. I can’t look in the mirror anymore. I have no friends because i don’t and wont trust anybody. I’ve never known love only rejection. I only seem to piss people off when I am around. It seems to me that everyones’ life that i have come in contact with would […]
Im about 13, ive been cutting my self ever sence i was 10.
im deeply depressed,
everyone hates me,
no one loves me for who i am,
people dont look at me for what i am, but what i have done,
i have been beaten when i was little,
ive lost over 50 pounds in a month, just becuz i stoped eating,
peoplel dont belive i will kill my self, i have tryed to multiple times.
i sit in class all day ignored
i dont talk to people
im always getting in trouble
i have thoughts of killing my self and others
i never have done anything for the world yet and i wont, people say i […]
Ok, so life hasn’t been so great lately. So there’s this girl who said she loved me a few days ago, and I LOVED her for months and months and watched her get boy-friend after boy-friend while I’m almost certian she knew I was in love with her, so I was basically nothing to her when she had a boy-friend and when they cheated on her or broke up, Of course I was “the best” and “super amazing” because I’m so soft harted I CAN’T not forgive some one. And I just kept loving her. And now recently I knew I would never have her […]
Dear Friends,
I want to tell you that I love you. I love you all so much. If you think I’m talking to you, I am. If you think I’m not talking to you, I am. I am not fazed by the mistakes you’ve made, the errors you’ve dealt, the selfish or humiliating or hopeless things you’ve done. I am indifferent to your age, your gender, your hair color, your battle scars. I love you with the purest, most earnest compassion I can summon. I know that we’re all so lost and afraid… I am so lost and so very afraid. But no matter how lost […]
im 16 my name is jeff, i am depressed and dont know why, my mom and dad got a divorce when i was 5 and i live with my mom, i am a christian, i hav a fairly good relationship with both of my parents, i’m actually not a bad looking kid, but i havent had a girlfriend in like 3 yrs, i feel very along bc ppl say they are there for me, the they arent. but speaking of girls, there is this one, and i dont know about you other guys (PLEASE TELL ME IF YA’LL DO THIS) but every time you think […]
I sort of don’t want to write here, because whenever I read other people’s posts, I realise that I have so little to really complain about. But, at the same time, I just find it so hard to continue living my life. Again, and I know lots of people write this, but I don’t really want or expect any kind of comments on this post, I just need to say these things, because I have no one else to say them to, and I’m tired of the same shit just cycling around my head all day and all night. So here I go, getting it […]
“No one is worth your tears…… Then why do we cry when we lose them?”
I am a 26 year old guy that came from a great family, married an incredible women, and fathered the most precious little girl 2 years ago last month! My life was amazing and then I became addicted to prescripton drugs. My entire world has been turned upside down and I have deeply deeply hurt my amazing wife (who left me in Febuary) my parents, my siblings, and my baby girl. I have gone through rehab and I go to meetings, but tonight I found out that my wife is ready to move forward with her life and that I am not included in those […]
I don’t no how to start but i am going to start by saying all of this pain i have is making it into suicide
~~I’m always home watching my brothers and never have any freedom to do what i want i never see my mom at home spend no day with us no more that hurt because we always used to hange out and have time to share anything with her when we need help or happy or sad or mad but not no more i keep it all to my self deep inside AND never tell no one it hurt to have to fake […]
When i feel im doing something good with my life something happens that shoots me into the ground.Being the youngest of five most would think i would be the babyed one the spoiled little bastard that gets what ever i ask for.And where i have received the things i had wanted im told its just because im the baby one,not that i had done something good enough for a reward.Always being told that beauty is the only way you’ll make in the world is depressing when you find your self disgusting at times i will act as if im happy so i dont bring down […]
i have it good compared to others but i go and try to screw it up the first chance i get
by emily25
written by emily25
I am such an idiot! I see that something is finally going right, then I screw it up! I hate myself. This isn’t me. It’s not who I am. It’s wrong. I know it is wrong. I feel so guilty! Why did I do this? I know what the outcome will be. I have this small doubt still. Somehow It will work out. What if it dosn’t?! What if I lose the few people I have just because I had to say a few things like that?! I know how wrong it is. How wrong I am to do so. What the hell is wrong with […]
I’m trying to be here and be happy but I just don’t know how long I can keep up this lie. I look at the person that really cares about me and feel so bad about lying to them. I’ve lied about a lot and I don’t want to keep lying but I feel that if I tell her what I really have going on in my head I think it would scare her so much she’d be afraid of me. Then just yesterday I did something stupid but she doesn’t know. The other day she asked me if I have been thinking about cutting […]
Finally, oblivious parents have recognized my bulimic ways and decided to get me help. I’m going to a doctor tomorrow and I’m actually eating full meals. I feel…. pretty good. I thought all hell was going to break loose if they found out, but they were more understanding than I thought they would be. My brother knows, and he choose to just ignore me instead of supporting, but he can go fuck himself for all I care.
My bulimia was the cause of all my strife. I’ve felt happier in the past two days than I have in a long time. Though it will take me […]
Hello there. My name’s Jessica. My age, ill say is under an adult, by far. Any ways, im here to tell you. if there is any listeners. i suppose not. but i will go on. im at quite a young age, and im very depressed. i was led to fall in love with this amazing girl. yes, girl. and she played to love me bakc for a while, and i had to sit there and watch her get like 3 different boy friends and after each one crushed her i was there to lean on for a bit. and that was that. i got so […]
hi, this is the second time I write, last time I wrote “wanna die”. I still wish I’d just die. just fall over, dead…. I’ve promised a friend of mine that I’ll live untill school starts again, and now I regret. a promise is a promise, can’t break it. my life is spiraling downwards… had to break up with my boyfriend. know it sounds ridiculus, but I’ts true. just realised I was still so in live with the one who dumped me.. he really is’nt even a good person, but I still love him… he know that he ruined the rest of my life whwn […]