She walks through this life
Untouchable
Like sunlight through fog
Protractible
Shes kidnapped your heart
Impressionable
You’ll never break down her wall
Understandable
Its ‘cos of what she’s been through
Detestable
You wanna make it all right
Commendable
But shes got her own plan
Irreversible
And when its all done……forgivable.
Tag:
right
Right here right now
I’ll stop this
Somehow
I will make it go away
Can’t be here no more
Seems this is the only way
I will soon be gone
These feelings will be gone
THESE FEELINGS WILL BE GONE
I am crying alone in my room. I have not left my bed in over 16 hours and missed work today. I have a feeling I’ll be fired tomorrow if I show up. Might not show up tomorrow either. Long story short, I am feeling overwhelmingly suicidal again.
Not that I ever really stop feeling this way, but I’m talking about the bawling, give-me-a-gun-I’ll-do-it, type of suicidal thoughts. The kind that are uncontrollable and terrifying, not the logical and cold thoughts… These are emotional and broken and angry and indecipherable. And I hate myself so much for going through all this, for thinking this way. I […]
It never comes out right, never quite like it is in my head. I always come off like an angry, whiney freak when I try to explain to you how I feel. The truth is, I don’t think I’m actually an annoying person or a whiney one or even angry. I’m just sad, ya know? And stressed. Anxious. I’ve had a lot of messed up stuff happen in my life, much like most of you. I don’t think I am any better or worse. But I feel like I don’t belong here or anywhere. It’s like, I try to connect with someone, anyone, and it […]
How dare you do this to me. If you wanted to die you should’ve done so by yourself, alone so you wouldn’t hurt anyone. Instead you fell in love with me, and made me fall in love with you.
You knew how badly I was hurt before. You knew I’d been abused, lost people, had people walk out on me or abandon me. You knew I was plagued by demons from my past. I thought I could trust you. You, of all people.
I can’t do anything without thinking of you. You’ve blighted my life with your loss. I just want to end things myself now. What […]
Someone requested a happier song, so here is a song I wrote in middle school. I had a huge crush on my best friend (nothing ever came of that), so I wrote this dorky love song. I swear, I wrote betters songs at 12 then I do now haha.
http://suicideproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/Hardly-Dreamable-5_9_16-5.03-PM.m4a
Verse
I have found my heart with yours
Our colors run together right from our pores
And the paper thin walls between us break so easily
I feel so needy
And I’ve been thinking…
Chorus
You won’t ever leave me, baby
Ain’t that right?
You’ll stay by my side forever, baby
And even though it seems […]
I’ve only posted on here so many times but I’ve never really gotten deep into how I feel or what my life is like, mainly because I know nobody cares, but right now, things are so hard and I just really really wanna kill myself. The days are emotions range, I’m never truly happy though. I don’t think I can be happy on this earth anymore. Not until I leave it but I’m just at a really awful point right now and I don’t know what I’m looking for I just want to kill myself and feel so incredibly alone it’s awful.
So after suffering for over a decade of loneliness, I’ve decided today is the day I will kill myself. No one knows the pain I am in because nobody cares to know me. People only know fragments of who I am, and when I open up, it only scares them away. I am 32 years old I haven’t had a girlfriend since my early 20s and I am a fairly successful individual. I have a master’s degree and make $100,000 year. I don’t tell you this to brag, but to demonstrate that this disease affects everyone. I have served in the military for over 8 […]
Hey everyone, new and old SP members. I know its hard for you guys right now. But do me a favor and keep fighting. Im fighting too.
I’ve recently been into reading much more than I usually am. There’s this author, Paulo Coelho who seems to understand everything its crazy and be able to express exactly what i think and feel in his work. I don’t know what your situations are, but I really want you guys to consider no read these books. Im not saying they will change your life immediately. but they will definitely have you thinking, and acknowledging and growing.
I know a lot […]
I think I have the flu. Last night at work which was a horrible night in itself I started to feel weak tired headachy and sore. Kept having to sit down. Felt like I was burning up, later on found a thermometer and at 100.7 I definitely confirmed my suspicions. My mood took a hard crash in the meanwhile, feeling overly hopeless. I slept on and off for most of the past day, about to go back to sleep again. I am too tired to feel much of anything right now. I’ve only been awake because the animals gotta eat and I finally felt hungry […]
so I don’t know but I think I’m going insane.
I can’t sleep well at night; I have terrors and wake up tired.
And today I got and F on my test; which is so so weird because I studied hard and when I took it I felt really good about it. I thought I aced it.
And on top of that my ex is sending me horrible emails. ( I’ve been not responding because I just don’t want him in my life). He’s saying horrible mean things to me. Which is really random and just plain mean. Idk why he’s doing that.
I don’t […]
I’m tormented every single day of my life by so many things and I don’t know how to keep going. My aunt passed away a little over a month ago and it hurts just as much now as it did the day I found out. It hurts to know the death will soon be coming for my great aunt and grandmother whom I have lived with my whole life. When they die I will truly have nothing and no one in this world. I don’t think any amount of time can prepare me for when it happens. I can’t live my life!!! I cry all […]
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
I think the fact that I been cutting on an unusual amount recently has finally got me. I finally talked to both of my parents they’re both telling me to come home which I’m starting to think they’re right I’ve only been here 1 month the Amount have a Damage made to myself is too much . I think I’m actually might have left a scar so I I haven’t left a scar since I was 17 years old .when I left the the first letter of the words garbage worthless dirt selfish junk and I should kill myself .I seen yesterday those letters are […]
Well…
It’s so hard to write about this. U’ll be the first people who will know the truth about me even though you even don’t know my real name.
So…When my mom was pregnant, it turned up she had MS. This cannot be cured. There is no treatment. No chance. It can only gets worse. And it gets. I was the child she was going to born. My mom had the second, healthy baby but I’d like not to be ever born. If I hadn’t be born, she would be healthy now. She could be leading a happy life with my father and sister.In the first years […]
this is more to do with the comments than the post itself, i tried to write a comment but it didnt seem to post, so ill just put it here, as you can see its long, perhaps theres a word limit on comments? either way after writing so much i would be irritated to just delete it
Wow, this one really blew up didnt it? Just a couple of pints id like to add after reading all the comments.
Firstly is the discussion over ways to help, @salt you know i agree with what you say regarding more serious members need more serious help instead of […]
I wish I could runaway from all this pain I feel everyday I’m drowning in my own mind. I want to leave this stupid family behide and live a better life of my own if that’s even possible
So to anyone on here that kind of knows me, no I’m still not dead :(, and yes I was supposed to be. Everything imploded and I was all set to get on outta here.
Then things looked up for a brief moment. Hope is dangerous. I was ready to die, why didn’t I just do it?? Now I’m scared again. Because I thought maybe I could stick around for a bit, but that’s turning out not to be true.
I’m right back where I was, only now I’m afraid.
I used to be happy. I used to be full of joy. I used to be bursting with life. What happened? What made me feel this way, living with so much hate and emptiness? I’m an average person with nice friends, a caring family, and an endless amount of love in their heart, right? Wrong. That’s what people think about me, that’s what people believe that I am. Sadly, they don’t know the real me. In reality, I’m a wreck. I have had depression for a month, suffer from anxiety attacks, and lack motivation, not to mention the constant emptiness I feel. I recently started […]
It’s extremely sad and unfortunate when I realize that the majority of my depression and anxiety stems from my relationship with my ex. Would I be depressed and have anxiety if it weren’t for him? Yes. But I was never this bad until we broke up.
We talked last night. We decided to be just friends a while back, maybe a month or so ago… but since then he was seriously avoiding me. It caused me severe depression. I cry often. I can’t listen to music because 90% of music is about love. My heart breaks every moment. It’s bad. Anyway, he explained last night that […]