Tried to take 70 pills, cops stopped me.

Hello! They say writing and sharing your experiences can be therapeutic, and in my case that is especially true. So, today I thought I’d take a moment to sit down and have a little chat with all of you.

My story really begins about 8-9 months ago. I was going through a rough time, I had just found out I have a lump in my spine. In the past years I have been diagnosed with:

Reynauds Disease
Fibromyalgia
Osteoporosis (in my neck)
Osteoarthritis (neck, again)
Heart Arrhythmia
Severe Insomnia (still being tested to see exactly which sleep disorder I have)

So, the ominous lump was disconcerting. Then, shortly after my birthday came round. I bought a Boa Constrictor (I have 7 snakes, 1 Leopard Gecko and 6 Tarantulas) all was well until I had to put more air holes into his enclosure. I was arguing with my step sister who came to visit, and the drill stopped working, causing sharp plastic to stick into the enclosure. By this point, my step sister was on the phone with police because she had just had a baby and felt “threatened” even though I am the only one in the family to never hit somebody outside of self defense, AND I was in another room the whole time.

So, I knew police would be showing up and I really wanted to fix that sharp plastic! This next part was a bad decision on my part: I thought to get a knife to shave it off. So, I walked into the kitchen and got the knife, NEVER once looked at my step sister or even said anything while I was in the kitchen.

As I am walking out, into the living room where my new Snakes enclosure was, I hear her say to the 911 operator: “He just threatened me with a knife!”. That’s when I lost it. Started cussing her out at the top of my lungs and began saying that I was going to kill myself. Somehow, I managed to fix my snakes cage so it was safe just as police arrived. I dropped the knife and headed upstairs.

I wasn’t serious when I threatened to kill myself, but once I got upstairs, the gravity of the situation hit me, my entire ****** life hit me, and THEN I was serious.

I had around 70 pills hidden away. Tylenol 3’s, Ativan, Extra strength Advil ect. A real concoction. As I finally got the baggie that contained them open, I heard police marching up the stairs. I had two options.. Start swallowing pills as fast as possible, and risk just messing myself up and failing, and having the police bust down my door possibly hurting my animals. Or, I could answer the door.

So, I very reluctantly put down my glass of water and pile of pills. I opened the door, I walked out and tried to explain I wouldn’t fight, run ect. But they tackled me to the ground and cuffed me. I began chanting “I am not resisting. I do not have a weapon nor drugs on my person. I am not Resisting” Luckily, the one officer crushing my back with his knee had his talkie on. Everybody on the force could probably hear me! Saving me from possible police brutality, as it is common where I am.

I was taken into my kitchen, questioned and asked for my side of the story. I was 100% truthful, compliant and determined to minimize the damage so to speak.

I was cuffed again, and brought to a squad car outside. The police finally verified that my step sister was full of baloney, so all charges were dropped in that regard. However, the giant pile of pills guaranteed me a visit to the psych-ward.

When I got to the hospital, it was very upsetting to think of what my life had come to. But, I finally got a phone call. I called a friend, someone I knew could make me feel better no matter what was happening. After speaking with her, I went to my room and slept 90% of the time, until I was finally moved from holding to the actual psych-ward. It was driving me insane in there, after 4 days my assigned doctor knocked on my door.

It was his approval I needed to get out, and I wanted to leave more than anything else in the world. I gave a valiant heart felt speech about how I had learned from the situation, and that I know I am accountable for all wrong doings I have done in my life, and am honestly trying to fix things.
After all, I am still alive.

He said to me “you’re intelligence supersedes your age. You make a very good argument, I tend to agree with a majority of what you claim about yourself based on your psychological profile. Therefore, I see no reason to keep you here.”

I was led to a holding room, while my family/friends were rung up to find someone to pick me up. I waited 1 hour for someone to show up, and the whole time I cried.

My mother and step father had shown up, and they asked why I never called. I told them I only got 1 call and I had to let someone know I was okay, beyond that they wouldn’t allow me access to a phone. They gave me a letter or two from family/close friends. The doctor talked to us as a group, and then I was finally discharged.

When I got home, it took a good week or two to finally feel “normal” again. I am past the suicide stage at this point (for the most part, sometimes those thought

s cross my mind but it’s never serious like it was before) and I am happy I didn’t kill myself. As it stands I have new-found friends who are genuine and caring, my family isn’t on my bad side so much and I am generally feeling better psychologically.

If anybody has any questions, feel free to ask! Thank you so much for reading!