I Will Survive

I did this, you can too.

6

She is just perfect…

  January 19th, 2018 by Urm8451n

Putting life’s burden aside, I ask for an advice of how to date this girl from university….

I know most of you would go crazy for my posting this question, but.. I see you people as my friends hehe.. (lol that is kind pathetic but I could not care less)

anyway she’s only 1 year older. We had a brief talk, I made her laughed, learned her name carefully, smiled and joked with her.

I don’t know when, but I know I’ll see her again around. That time I would like to get her number… how the fuck do I do that? …

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0

I don’t see my self finishing it. I feel like shit.

  January 11th, 2018 by Urm8451n

I lost so much at the last years.

I know I would never be the same person, I already saw myself changing with the years.

I became a mad-man ;
Lacking sympathy, don’t feel love or any kind of true social bond.

I became more and more sociopath, but with the understanding of human beings. I can identify most of the people’s weaknesses and I usually take advantages of it for my own good, only to survive.

Look… It is just that I’m pissed of on my reality.

But I guess it doesn’t matter. AS LONG AS I KEEP PUSHING THE SHIT OUT OF IT.

anyway good day you all, with …

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2

What’s today?

  January 10th, 2018 by Mosaic

I will be strong,
I made up my mind

So why look back,
Theres still hope in sight.

Day by day,
Step by step

These little things I will never forget.

I once was weak,
But this is my day

I will be strong,
Get the fuck out my way.

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5

I lied… Why admit it?

  January 10th, 2018 by Urm8451n

I lied to you guys about quitting this site…
I just can’t, you strangers are the only one to talk to.
I’m getting really lonely, and afraid of losing control.
I’m at my second semester, February is going to be the finals (University tests). Last semester I scored 88.5 average which is pretty high. But I promised my mom to score around 95 this semester.

I’m focused on the target…..but at the end of the day, when it gets silent, and I feel like talking, I’ve none to talk to.

I’m a friendly fine looking man, it is not that I don’t …

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1

Victim

  January 10th, 2018 by lonewolf23

My mother could’ve and probably should’ve done something sooner. I know for a fact that things would’ve been better had she just acted sooner. My father was abusive and manipulative yet it took her 13 years to realize this. Either that or fear got the better of her judgement. I don’t hate my mom, I just hate her inaction and how things took so long to change. My teenage years along with some of my childhood years are so empty thanks to all the BS between my parents. I sometimes think I should’ve called the cops myself. But i couldn’t even do that back then …

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1

I’m still here.

  January 9th, 2018 by Isabella

Hey guys,

I just wanted to pop on and say that I’m still here. A little life update of sorts. Again, when I say that “I’m still here,” I just want to confirm that I’m alive. Alive and well? I’m doing alright. I’m sitting here with my boyfriend right now. Last time I wrote on this website, I had a boyfriend who lived in England. It’s not the same guy that is sitting with me right now. We broke up a few months ago, right at the same time I met this guy in my English class. However, I will say that I’ve stayed single for …

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10

Exit Sandman, Enter Goodguy

  January 9th, 2018 by goodguy

Hi guys, its been only one week since i found here and i feel a lot better than ever. I feel like i have a family in here. I have learned a lot from you guys. You guys are my heroes. I hope youre doing well.

I have said this so many times, and im sorry if im saying it again( i apologise, im young and unexperienced) :
Please Read These books. For god sake!:))
They helped to revive. I haven’t used any med (i couldn’t) until now but books about philosophy or other science majors.

If you don’t give a f*:
Mark Manson – The Subtle Art Of Not …

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5

I feel..

I feel..

  January 9th, 2018 by RiloMor

I know it’s kind of dumb thinking this way. Like, it’s not my fault my dad was not the brightest bulb in the box and I know this. But I hate him for doing this to me.

Maybe it’s me over-thinking things but, from my knowledge and knowing serverl people with disorders physical and mental as well as having researched it extensively.. I just can’t help but think that my father, and his stupied genes gave me all these worries. Hell, my half sister and half brother are even worse than I am after he got married to a lady whose bulb seems to be on …

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4

Looking Back

  January 7th, 2018 by colourandlight

  1. I spend a lot of time looking back. Especially recently.

Aged 9. Started self harming.

Aged 10. Tried to throw myself out of the window (several times).

Aged 11. Couldn’t understand why I was the way I was. What was wrong with me.

Aged 12. Distractions. Life. I wasn’t any better, but things kept moving.

Aged 13. Minor improvements. Self acceptance.

Aged 14. Good. Not great, but good. Acceptance. Progress. Self medicating through reading.

and life continued much the same until last year. Not good. Not bad. Clear head at least.

 

I met someone. We’ll call him Oscar. Or O.

He was amazing. A recovering alcoholic, who’d been driven to drink by the …

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5

On the bright side, there’s handicap parking…

  January 4th, 2018 by Cordless


.
The thing about having disability AND depression is…
When my body feels well enough to get out of bed, my mind often doesn’t.
And often when my mind is peaceful and content enough to get up and join the world, my body can hardly make it from one room to the other.

For the body, I have leg braces, canes, walker, wheelchair…
For the mind, I have music (performing & composing), reading, and art.

I’m single and I live alone; if i dont take care of myself, no one else does.

But it’s much easier said than done.

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5

happy new year

  January 1st, 2018 by iamdarling

happy new year

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2

God has answered my prays, I was reborn-ed.

  December 28th, 2017 by Urm8451n

Hey, good day for all of you.
This will be my last post

, because I have changed, and I’m quit-ing this site.
For those who didn’t follow my posts, or read the last posts of mine, I wanted to wake up today, fearless and with out feelings.

Fully honest with all of you strangers: for the last days I have been fighting in my mind, over the control of this body. As if I fought with my “anxiety” persona, which fears failures. Today I guess my other persona won, because I’m fearless. I’m focused on what I want and when I want it.

I’m just a kid, I …

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0

Sad

  December 25th, 2017 by lonewolf23

Today was Christmas Eve and i am somewhat sad because all my co-workers seemed to hate how cheery i was today. I’m typically always happy and in a good mood no matter what day it is but for some reason it irritated some of my co-workers today. I work at a grocery store as a cashier and so it was super busy today but i didn’t mind. After all, who wants to be served by a grumpy employee on Christmas Eve? I know i wouldn’t appreciate it if i went through some cashiers line and got dealt a mean attitude. I understand being a cashier …

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5

Never felt so mentaly naked

  December 24th, 2017 by Urm8451n

I’ve been told by a psychologist, that my “inner sensitive /feeling persona” is being held chained and at a close space inside my mind. He also stated that I’m good at dividing between having this horrible pains due sickness, and between fully functioning at my life and doing the best I can. He explained that my feeling persona gets to the conscious only when it has strength, and that happens when it is mad, or which when I’m mad.

He said that right after the pain stops, I totally repressive it from my consciousness, and I do it for …

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2

there might be hope

  December 13th, 2017 by lovvely

note: This is very important. I want to share this and show that hope does exist.

 

so, hi.

Again, all of the sweet comments, were as my name says, lovely.

Thanks to the people who were concerned about how I’m being treated by others, and also the people who said they had also experienced depression or anxiety. It was very reassuring.

 

Today was shockingly a decent day, it’s not yet finished, and the night is yet to come, but maybe it’ll all turn out okay. Night is always the worst time for me, and probably the most difficult to get through. I try to sleep it off, but it almost …

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0

Disorganized thoughts

Disorganized thoughts

  December 6th, 2017 by RiloMor

 

  • It’s not like I haven’t tried to speak my mind to, tell someone. In fact I have been hospitalized for my depression, 7 day lock up with medication and a councilor to ‘talk about it.’ But why did they believe me when I told them it was because of some random girl making fun of me for being gay and trans-masculine. I don’t know why I’m depressed, or why I panic when I’m near people or feel the need to just scream for no reason. Why did they think it was another person hating me when I was hating myself for not knowing why

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2

Reasons to live – Are there any?

  December 5th, 2017 by Urm8451n

I woke up.
It is 2:00 am, everything so dark outside.
Most of the people are asleep, some are driving cars, which lights are being shown in my room, from those cars passing around my street.

All birds are dead quite.

It is me time. Because there is no stress around, I can finnaly see clarity. What does even bother me now? I’m happy. I’m glad to find peace once a while.

However, tomorrow keeps its own demons waiting for me. The stress is greater than ever. Some obstacles, will sure make me trip down.
I will fall.

But even then, I will keep on going my way, doing the best I …

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7

How do I make it through?

  December 2nd, 2017 by Urm8451n

Hey, good week everyone.

Hope you guys do well.

This post I’m addressing to any reader with a question :

In the end of the day, you are still alive. How come? How did you make it through?  you are more than welcome sharing to me your secret.

 

I’m a little bit of suicidal now…

So freaking terrored by the idea of not making it through.

I see the following week and I’m disgusted of my life.

It’s going to be a tough time for me.

I never hoped to get this lonely, but here and there, life has brought me here.

Will I make it through, like you do?

Will I one day, stand …

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4

Maybe, I just need to jump… (to my death)

  November 28th, 2017 by Urm8451n

A lot of time has passed since I wrote here.

My last post was about “Tips and good bye”, but I came back.
I’m suffering from abdominal pains each day, and it has become more and more harsh.
I’m trying to study, but I can’t concentrate. Where ever I go, I feel isolated. It is not socialy isolation, it is different. I feel different.
I can’t explain how I’m doing, I can only say I’m cracked, I’m fully torn apart. I’m all alone in this war and I don’t FEEL like I can make it through, I need help, and I HAVE NOWHERE TO GET IT FROM.

I’m a fighter, …

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5

My story if anyone cares

  November 28th, 2017 by Max