I Will Survive

I did this, you can too.

2

Pressing forward; not up

  August 31st, 2017 by smw24

I spent 3 weeks on a psychiatric ward last winter and it destroyed me and my pride and all these people were deteriorating around me.  My family would visit me and it was so hard and scary.  There was no place of God there and I was not impressed with humanity anymore.  I read the bible and I prayed and prayed.  I walked through my own hell placing my trust in God’s promises and I survived and God did all these nice things for me that I didn’t even deserve.  Jesus still loves you even at your worst.  He transformed my soul and fortified and [...]
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1

On how poverty and a mattress may be the end of me

  August 28th, 2017 by heartlessviking

I notice that anger usually is my path to self destruction. I remember learning somewhere that the default emotion for men is anger. The default supposedly for women is sadness. Anyway, I have male anatomy and anger is my default.

I would be feeling fine if things were working well, isn’t it always the way? The issue comes back to unrealistic expectations, and for once they aren’t mine (or are they?).

I’m back in school, doing a full time load (actually a bit more). If all I was doing was school I could fucking succeed. It isn’t all I’m doing though.

First let’s talk about my health. I [...]
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1

They are back.

  August 23rd, 2017 by Eccedentesiastsoul

Lately I’ve ben having these migraines that take everything that’s in me to stand. It’s not new, I used to have them daily until they somehow, the same pain transferred to my stomach. I got it checked out by a doctor long back and he gave me pills and said I was fine to go. Now the pain is back and it’s stronger than ever. I’m not being over dramatic or anything but it hurts to the point where I actually think there’s something wrong with me. Before I got back to my country I got a strong one and I literally cried myself to [...]
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2

Tired.

  August 19th, 2017 by Eccedentesiastsoul

I don’t know what to do anymore. It’s like there is more than one soul in me. I have to make a choice, either be too kind and suffer the consequences or be heartless and later come crashing down. I could also just stay the way I am right now but the thing is I don’t feel fine. I could never stay like this. Ignoring the way I feel is killing me. I’m just tired and sick of this life. I feel so selfish, I have everything I need to be able to survive yet I’m still depressed. I just can’t go back. Summer is [...]
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52

You Don’t Know What’s Good For You

  August 19th, 2017 by Angel of Life

WARNING: It is not enough if you have read these techniques.  You must put actually put the techniques into practice! Everyday we are expected talk softly to suicidal people and treat them as though they are rational and understand how the brain works. They don’t. If you don’t understand that you REALLY don’t know about mental illness and you better read carefully to the end. You are the only one who can fix this and unfortunately you have no training, education or experience to do so, and the disease you have actually tries to stop you from fixing it. I was depressed until the age [...]
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4

I am a disappointment

  August 18th, 2017 by haterlivet

One thing i´ve always thought of is that it´s so scary when someone mentally ill and suicidal (me) falls in love. We start feeling whole again. Like we´ve got a purpose, a reason to be here and a reason to start and try.

But one thing that really scares me and hurts me inside to think of  is that; what happens when the person who´s saved me leaves? What happens when the person takes away all the hope and love and beauty and rip out all the stitches they used to put in their partner together again and the broken soul is left worse than they [...]
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5

Suicide without hurting others

  August 18th, 2017 by haterlivet

I want to end my life, But i want to end it in a way that doesnt hurt the people around me. I’ve come to learn that this life really aint for me, i tried for so many years to stay strong and fight the pain Im feeling, But its absolutely impossible and Nobody really understands the mental illness Im going through. I dont really like to talk about my depression to a lot of people, Cause they think that Im calling for attention or that its no big of a deal. But i really wish They knew What Im going through

My biggest problem is [...]
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5

start them young

  August 17th, 2017 by hollowchest

Hi. I just wanted to get my thoughts off and just rant. Anyone else think the house is just a prison? Your parents just owners? Granted that depends on who you have as parents, so it begs the question, if they aren’t doing their job properly in raising a child, why even have one? Like why have children only to condemn them and never support or encourage them? I’m not asking much, there’s certain responsibilities they obviously need to fulfill due to the child’s inability to look after themselves, such as picking them up from school when they’re young. Other than that, anything negative that [...]
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3

I dunno

  August 9th, 2017 by Theycallmedramatic

I have so much to say, so much to think about, but I feel like I can’t find a part of humanity that will understand my way of thinking. In this world people care so much about things I find uninteresting. Maybe that is just an example of everyone being different, sure; however, I desperately need an ear like my own to listen to me. I am only eight-teen but my severe life-long depression and anxiety has stayed by my side like a shadow filled with pollution. I wanna die, but that would break a promise. But I wanna die still. That promise is my [...]
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3

Is It Really All It’s Going To Take?

  August 9th, 2017 by Eccedentesiastsoul

I do not think I am capable of being loved. I fear that I am never going to be able to find someone who will love me the way I fail to love myself. It has always been my only hope. What if it’s the only way all of this will ever get better? To find the right person who will always be there for me. The thing is I’ve been lied to so many times that I don’t think I can trust anyone anymore. People talk to me when they need something then they just disappear. If I refuse to do what they ask [...]
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2

9am thoughts

  August 8th, 2017 by Eccedentesiastsoul

Okay. So I don’t really know how this works. What if someone I know finds this, what then? How am I going to explain all this. When people I know see my cuts they judge and say I do it for attention so what will they think if they ever found this? I just need my space, I want to be able to express my thoughts without being scared but I guess fear is always going to be there.


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12

The Average guy.

  August 2nd, 2017 by Urm8451n

After getting accepted to the Uni’ (a really good world known one), I have finished my first semester with an average grades of 75.
75 means – No jobs as a student, hard time finding job once I’m out, and other shitty stuff.
But what is worst is the fact that I went back home. I went back to the nothing I have. To the environment where I have to work a lot while my…. UsedToBe Friends, got their parents as financial backup.
I feel just the way I felt as a 4th grader – Isolated, powerless, incompetent.
My spirit as a fighter died, I [...]
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4

A Prayer and Health Tips for the Depressed

  July 29th, 2017 by BlueDiamond

Staying healthy is important for the depressed:

Be sure to live through your body, by this I mean by being physical active such as going to the playground to play like a little kid, biking, or regular fitness work-outs.

Along with exercise, eat a healthy diet with lots of leafy green vegetables

Never isolate yourself, try to maintain healthy relationships with peers and stay away from negativity

Reduce stress doing things such as listening to relaxation music or coloring

Pick up hobbies such as art or sports

This one I think is most important is being one with the universe, creating that oneness, or peace with God:

This can be achieved with [...]
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1

wednesday – 1:01AM

  July 25th, 2017 by suicidalkitty

What frustrates me so much is that this sickness taps on my windows on cold, stormy days, begging me not to sleep. It sits on my lap taunting me to caress its soft but stinging, midnight fur. In busy crowds, it whispers my name as i walk, telling me sugar-coated stories of how it made at least 5 souls drain out all the sadness inside of them in thick red in the last 4 hours it left me so i could finally close my eyes and sleep. But on days where i sleep longer and wake up waiting for its thick cloud to suffocate me, i [...]
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3

Why do I exist?

  July 25th, 2017 by oganesson315

I was born on February 12, 2002. Whatever the hell my mother had in mind I don’t know… I am a boy. I was born in Ukraine.

My real father wasn’t ready for me and left me when I was 2 yo. That is when my story pretty much begins.

From ages of 5 to 10, I was pretty much raised by my grandparents. They would comfort me every time I cry, which was bad. Every time I was whining or having tantrums, I would get what I want. Which later stuck in me. And I was bullied in school because [...]
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6

My Parents are Narcissists

  July 22nd, 2017 by BlueDiamond

I’m afraid of writing this post because they might be watching this web-site. I talk and they pretend not to listen, but they’re watching me closely.

I discovered this weeks upon accidently stumbling upon Narcissist parents. They resemble this parenting style the most. When I learned about narcissism. It all everything clicked. Why I’m  so unhappy. Why my self-esteem is so low to almost non-existing. Why my parents confused me, and yet I never wanted to blame them for fear that I’ll upset them like feel their wrath if you challenge let alone question it their ego.

Here, I thought that my mom was overprotected and my [...]
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4

One More Step.

  July 21st, 2017 by kellinandrew

I tell myself, one more step, every day. When I wake up, I think, just one more day. I try to keep my mind on one day, one moment, at a time. Because when I begin to let my mind drift, I start to slowly drift away. Sliding into an uncontrollable downward spiral. I cannot keep living my life through the small window I have allowed myself. I feel as if I am completely alone. My boyfriend, is gone. Our relationship fell apart after I lost our baby due to a miscarriage. My rape case against my father has been dismissed. So, he is on [...]
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1

I’m here for you

  July 18th, 2017 by firefly11291998

Hey guys, if you see this and want/need to talk. I’m always open to talk. I really want to make someone(anyone) feel like they are worth it….


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3

There are times I’m not miserable

  July 17th, 2017 by arachnophilia

Monday and Tuesday of last week, I wasn’t miserable. I felt, for the first time in a long time, (months at least) a kind of soothing calm, a low-grade contentment. I was reading a book at the time, and I tucked the emotion around me like a warm robe, luxuriating in it until it inevitably seeped out of me.

The last time I’d felt something like this was during a foggy morning around the middle of the winter semester, while I waited for the bus. My heart was a still cool pond, deep and clear and utterly undisturbed. It lasted for half an hour.

Most of the time [...]
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20

Techno-Gadgetry

  July 16th, 2017 by Cordless

Those of you who were here last year might remember  that one of my bucket list items was to learn how to use a smartphone.

I’d gotten the tiniest cheapest one. And I learned how to do SP posts on it.

Aaaand the easier it got, the more I liked it. A lot.

Enough to decide I wanted a better phone.

Bought a new one last week.

Samsung Galaxy Sky J3.

16GB, plus I added a 32GB SD card.

I love it!

The old one feels like a cheap [...]
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