this cold, cruel, unforgiving world & people makes me depressed & suicidal

I’m stuck in a very strange position. It seems that overall my life is not worth living, so from a purely self-interested point of view I should probably kill myself. But I’m still very much attached to the idea of life, and afraid of death. So I instinctively don’t want to do it. I also believe that it would devastate my family, likely causing them greater suffering than I’m in now. So I also shouldn’t do it from an objective moral viewpoint, at least as long as my parents are still alive and so invested in me.

But when they pass on, or when something gets […]

Everything came crashing down again. I ruined everything. I don’t want to be here anymore. I’m tired. Life isn’t fun. This is too much for me. I want to kill myself. I don’t know how but I just want it to stop hurting.

Hi from Qld Australia was wondering if there is anyone else in Australia

So I left NYC for peace of mind, because I couldn’t take the stress and negative effect that NYC had on me and I do feel a little better I have to say but with that being said, here I lay In this empty apt all alone and I need a better half. I hate to do this on here but I need a female that understands me and vice versa, so we can go through this journey of life together and support and help each other along the way, me m/44/ND dating sites don’t work for me, I need someone like minded

I came here to post a song , but anyone else notice this site now has an “AIOSEO Score” (whatever that is) when you make a post and is no longer secure when you look in the corner of the search bar? RIP, SP, I guess. Final nail in the coffin.

Anyone here still got the Discord?

Its been so long, and I really hate to say I’m back. Its like depression never ends!!! This was the only place I could turn to when things got rough, and I wanted to be a big girl and tough it out, my life just plays over in a  shitty loop with extra surprise every go round. I knew that as soon as I tried to find this site it was over, as much as everyone was a big help, I know deep inside I’m a lost cause. I feel like I’m really not supposed to be here like the world is rejecting me, did […]

I think I’m done with life (I’ll still be here though, reasons…)
Like, I’m just fed up with it. I don’t enjoy anything. I only pretend to. Well that’s not entirely true, but I don’t enjoy anything substantial. I like some music for example, but this won’t make me like life lol.
No interests, no hobbies, not interested, pointless.
Nothing
Nothing
Nothing
Nothing.

is death a bad idea?

All i want is to stop being a nobody in my own family, the last priority. Is it too much to ask for people to thank me from time to time?

I feel quite hopeless today.

I can be an asshole sometimes, and even though I don’t ever misbehave on purpose, sometimes i just can’t stop myself on time. Every single day i try my best to act accordingly, to do everything that must be done and what is, now, expected of me. However, sometimes i simply lose it, and act out. I don’t know why i do that, i really don’t. But it hurts others […]

I feel like mylife is falling to pieces and don’t know what to do….my boyfriend for 13 years hate me and want me out of his house….i have a child for him… she is 8 years old… the way he makes me feel, is like i cutting myself on the leg,belly and breast too…. i also drug myself untill i cant move just to be happy.

and how they’ve messed up their lives? -_-

I think I saw this site a long time ago when I was a suicidal teen, but now as I continue to be pushed further down a path of hopelessness, anhedonia, ever-increasing despair, loneliness/isolation, and abandonment I’m not sure where else is left to vent my thoughts.. I’m just a complete freak with no way of ever possibly becoming an actual person and I seem to be so terrible that everyone will always reach some threshold of caring until they basically give up on me. I feel like I’m just “damaged goods”, and that it’s impossible for me to ever be better.. I’m so unbelievably […]

yet cannot end life…

The angel with the crooked wings and crooked mind

You are the demon
You ask the angel to become your stopper

You are the demon
You said you will help to find the new wings

You are the demon
You left the lonely angel alone

You are the demon
Who close your eyes, mouth, ears
The angel is about to dissapear

thoughts on long distance relationships? i’m currently in one from like two months. major overthinker here. shit’s going fine i guess.

I am so tired of

Doctors
Medication
Blood tests
Needles
Pain
Waking up in hospitals being told I’m “lucky to be alive”
Doctors telling me they don’t know why
Hospital food
The sound of the medication timer
My body surprising me with new symptoms and dangerous complications.
My mind turning into mush
Spending holidays in the hospital
Being poked and prodded by ppl in scrubs, talking in hushed tones, while the moniter beeps
Iv poles
Fighting to get thru work
Calling in sick to work
Having to fake it for the camera
Telling men on first dates
Telling friends I’m too sick
Telling family I don’t […]

Everyone thinks me not wanting to talk or see people is rude and selfish but its been the way ive been since birth i have always been antisocial and human touch has always been creepy and i feel like if i was truly selfish i would just be dead right now but im suffering thru life just to make them happy for another day

I woke up…i woke up…i wasn’t supposed to wake up…but i woke up…

…sick, sore, deeper cuts, the red stuff everywhere. I can’t move my arm right. A f*****g mess. Stomach feels like i’ve been stabbed. That was supposed to be enough. I couldn’t see straight, let alone unlock the best option…

…i feel s******r than i did before…failed at this too. A few more cups of courage…

I hope the ones you think l*v* you, tell you they do…if not, bottoms up, i feel that pain…

#help

Free from this world and free from this life. My family remains the same pieces of shit that they are. I had a significant other that is broken from my pain. Now he causes my pain and he does it without blinking. It’s over I feel it now, and it sucks. I will be spending my time off in the hospital because yet again my elderly relative is sick and no one else will step up. I have the weight of the world on my shoulders.  That world is crumbling on top of me and I can’t keep going on like this. I can’t try […]