Mylife was happy b4 i came with him, all he ever do is beat and calls me stink names, and hes family wishes i was dead. It looks like he never wants to be with me. I feel aline and abondon, like i dont belong in this world. I took sleeping pills so i wouldnt feel the pain. 25 pills and it didnt work. My child does see me crying and tells me not to cry that i will be happy one day, and shes only 3.
Tag:
wants
I know a lot of people on here have the kik messaging app. If not, it is free. Just instant messaging.
I feel like it would be nice for a group of us to join a chat room on it though. It would be fun. Let me know if anyone wants to 🙂 I already have 3 peoples kik on here, so it’s a start
my kik is devinx7
Acceptance is crucial. Kind of. And it happens to be relatively difficult for me sometimes. But I’m getting there. I have to accept that no one cares, no one loves me, needs me, or wants me. I’m insignificant and unimportant to anyone but myself. It use to pain me so much and it’s still upsetting but I now realize that even though it’s not ideal, I’m all I have, and all I need. I didn’t get very many good things in this life, but the one’s I did get I am grateful for. I’ve been holding off on writing my suicide note because I want […]
Thanks to those that read my posts about my ex. And for all the advice I got. I am in a much better place now.
My last post about him was how I let him go. It’s been about a month now. I feel better. I’m still depressed, but not nearly as much. I don’t find myself crying anymore. I don’t feel like I want to die. I feel like I can breathe now. Love is something else. Loss is crazy. Loss hurts like nobody’s business.
I don’t know where we’re going to end up – my ex and I. I say that because even now, I […]
So, let’s start this off right, shall we? I suffer from psychosis. Meaning, I suffer from hallucinations on top of my major depressive disorder. These voices are evil creatures. James – The ring leader – wants me dead. Hailey wants others dead. Jimmy – The nice one – left years ago, I’m assuming hallucinations can off themselves too. I’m so sick of hearing from them. And yes, I’m on medication. And again, yes, I have been taking it. I’m so sick of this world. Nothing good comes of it. But god help me if I don’t want to live in this filth encrusted world we […]
Part of me wants so badly to just end it but I know it would kill my family and I have a huge fear of not knowing what’s after. I’ve always been raised religious. The only thing that leaves is homelessness. My lease ends the 31 and I have no place to go and no family or friends willing to take me in. I can’t say I blame them though. Anyone been homeless and have any advice?
I’ve been feeling very badly lately, and it has been amplified by how others treat me, what they do and don’t do is affecting me deeply.
Lately, I’ve been in so much pain that I can’t seem to be able to verbalize my thoughts. I’ve spent too long being closed. I feel I haven’t had anything positive to say about myself, so I stay away from people. I also feel very bad about myself, so I avoid seeing anyone. I’ve been a recluse for the last few years, and because of my circumstances, I will never change back.
The only person who truly has […]
Greetings. I created an account just now– but I’ve been reading some posts here for quite some time. I hope this type of post is acceptable.
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At first glance, you won’t really see me for who I am.
They see a curious wanderer, a determined overachiever, a hopeful soul, an enthusiastic teenager.
They say I bring sunshine, rainbows and butterflies wherever I go.
They think I’m awake at 3 in the morning because I’m eager to learn more about this world, because I’m comforting someone who needs my help, because I’m out running.
And at second glance, you still won’t see me for who I […]
I have a friend, and our relationship had grown into something more. I have known that she has leukemia that has been in remission for a few years, but it’s back. After a long conversation she told me that she love’s me, and…. I have to say I love her too. Even with the things going on in our lives, I still assured her I was here for the long haul. I don’t want her to feel alone or like she has to face this alone like she did the first time. After a divorce that completely crushed me, I stayed alone […]
Man oh man I surely miss those times before I was born, felling nothing, no hunger, no thirst, no emotions and times flew bye so fast don’t you think guys ?
So yeah I really want to go back to those good days, I don’t want a paradise or hell, I don’t want to be conscious, maybe because I fear to see my family from the otherworld.
But jeez it is so tempting, the good old days, jokes on me if we live again the same life.
so yeah, loosing it soon as time goes bye and as the gun locker laughs at me.
If anyone wants to know […]
Lately, I’ve noticed that my ability to rationalize has been strained, especially when it comes to decisions related to expanding my relationships with others.
On the one hand, there is the side of me that’s been institutionalized by cultural norms–the person that wants to get a girlfriend, wants to have lots of friends, and just wants people to like me in general.
But running counter to the institutionalized side of me, is the altruistic me, who believes that having any of those things would be selfish of me and that those relationships would be detrimental to those other entities.
And then there’s the third side that says, none of it really […]
Hey! I am a 35-year old guy from Finland. I first came to this board around 5-years ago.
I have meat here a lot of people. A lot of badly depressed people from many different countries ;=((
If there is anyone from any country who wants to email to me for any reason, please mail me at Tomialatalo@inbox.com
Well, very average at best. I long ago accepted my ugliness and depression but just recently after many years they’ve started to bother me again, making me more suicidal. Why? I already came to terms with it. Seems life just wants me to carry on suffering and beating myself up about it. Looks are everything to people nowadays and everyone knows it. They are the passport to a much easier life and happiness.
Everybody in this house just doesn’t want to exist. I heard my grandma saying this and how am I supposed to help her when I don’t even know how to find the reason to live? I’d like to help her but sometimes her mind is just not in as good condition as it used to be. My mother blames my grandma for the fact that my mom’s condtion is worse. That’s because about one or two years ago, when my sister and I were at school, grandma could help mom walk. In this way, she was still exercising. But when grandma went to the hospital, […]
Well hey lovely people of suicide Project. I haven’t been here in awhile if you have noticed if any of you know who I am.
So awhile back I made a post about I Dye my hair. Its my self distraction from self harm. People seemed to like that so I think I’m going to make a journal hopefully everyday or maybe a cpl days or once a week in not sure yet. But I’m here for all of you. I wont judge because everyone needs a friend and you shouldn’t feel alone. So if I make a journal for you guys it’ll be self distractions […]
she’s hurt and lost
crippled by all the pain she feels everyday
shes trapped and the doors are locked
there’s no one to help her
to hear her screams
to hear her drowning in her own blood
to hear she wants to leave this world
just to be heard by someone would give her hope back
but she’s empty
lost, lonley and dying
all she asks for is to be gone and never return
to leave all her crap behide
to leave the nobody she has behide
to just leave this useless place
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DMXC3jFxsdc
My first montage. Not the best but some cool clips in there.
Anyone wants to game XBL: ImmuneVariable
Why can’t I be left alone why I cant be just left alone . I am once again being tortured by every one my mother my father my in laws im tired… Im telling my self not to cry … Every wants to control my life …..my husband dosent want to go home because of my parents …I just cant be left alone cant tell them I wanna go to utah becuse there gonna flip why why why . cant cry stop it . I dont know what to doo so lost ….cant even get a chance to fix my life …..Im not a big […]
It’s fucking 7:11am in the NZ here I am woken up looking after my brother’s kids have to fucking do all the shit he would if he was here
Feed them cereal
Make my nephew’s lunch
Get them dressed into their superhero costumes
Have their bags by the door
The whole time I’m doing this make sure they don’t cause World War 3 or argue over a stupid felt/marker because they are currently colouring in, in their books.
Also make sure my niece doesn’t press the button on her Elsa dress that plays the whole song of let it go because I might be prone to pull my hair out….
I’m such […]
You’ve come back again, and here i am again.. i thought last time was the last time that’d id post because i was officially out of the shit hole i was in.. i have a feeling there are going to be more of those situations to come in the future, maybe this will be the last time.. Hopefully the light will shine sometime soon.. For those of you still hanging on, i fucking envy you, you guys are the strongest people i probably know in my life right now.. I mean I’m still hanging on, but running on fumes, i don’t know how you guys […]
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